Hi everyone!
I'm in this interesting situation and would love any insight on how to go about it. I recently had to decide who my bridesmaids were going to be and I ended up picking 8 of my girls. I felt that the girls and number was just right for me and didn't want to go any more than that.
Around the same time that I got engaged, a long term friend of mine also got engaged. My relationship with her is that we've been friends since highschool all the way til now (10+ years). I wouldn't say we are the best of friends but we've definitely always had more of a consistent friendship where we get lunch/dinner every now and then to catch up on things. We sometimes also text. I made a tough decision not to include her in my bridal party due to a few factors: commitment since she lives a few hours away and the number of my bridal party overall. Truth be told, I also feel more closer to the girls that I had already picked vs my overall relationship with her.
This is where it gets tricky - she recently asked me to meet her and I can tell she may be about to ask me to be in her bridal party. And so, we set a date to meet. The tricky part is that I had already a pre-planned brunch with my own bridesmaids a few weeks before me and her plan to meet. My question is - should I let her know gently that she won't be a part of my bridal party? I was thinking I'd love for her to be a part of my bachelorette and bridal party instead. I feel like it would be a slap in the face if she were to find out via social media/other people. What would you do?
