Wedding and expenses

Finances are one of the biggest reasons couples get divorced. This is the best time to begin having the really uncomfortable discussions about how you both view finances and debt and financial priorities, especially when it comes to big expenses (if you hadn’t already, and if you have, to continue having those discussions). If you are getting $22k in gifts, do you have $8k you both feel comfortable spending? The only correct answer is the one that you two mutually agree on.

Money management is one of the main topics that makes or breaks a relationship. Make a list of bills and living expenses that you have. Those must be taken care of first. Anything leftover is play money and that is what goes towards the wedding or a house. As for money from other people, don’t count that in until you have it in your hands. Also, many people feel that if you are old enough to get married, you are old enough to budget how to pay for it on your own because finances from other people have strings attached. They get final say in your planning because they are writing the checks. That applies whether they give you a million dollars or $5.


Plan the wedding with your existing money not from the parents or other outside loans and get creative however you need to. Couples get married with next to no money every day even though the internet shames them for it. So it is possible.

That is a very large amount of debt assuming even a top PT salary. My advice is to take your fiancé to see a financial planner and talk about what you should have saved at this point, and how much you need to add to savings each year to stay on track to achieve your long and short term goals. It might be eye opening. As PPs say, if you are not on the same page on financial. matters, a wedding is only the beginning of the potential opportunities for major conflict. You may also want to consider couples counseling.

As for the gifts, if there are no strings attached, in your place there's no way I'd be spending that money on a wedding at this time. If the money is exclusively meant to be used for a wedding, then I'd plan the wedding with that budget in mind.

That is a lot in student loans, mine aren't even that high and I thought I was scammed lol But I do agree with the pp and think you and him need to sit down to talk about finances and budgeting. 22k, in my option, enough for a lovely and decent ceremony and reception. If he is planning on going into debt with a wedding then you might want handle the money part yourself. I think you should speak with him and come up with a reasonable budget and what is more important to both of you so that y'all can prioritize some categories like attire and pictures or food and drinks.

Hope this helps and good luck