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Mrs. Cohen
Super October 2018

We got Married! - Here's everything that went wrong....

Mrs. Cohen, on October 22, 2018 at 3:20 PM Posted in Wedding Ceremony 0 40
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We got married 1.5 weeks ago (yay!). Our honeymoon was magnificent and we're so sad to be back to reality now. I'm excited to post about our honeymoon adventures and of course share our wedding photos once we get them from our incredible photographer along with all of the amazing things that went well during our special day. BUT, first things first, I gotta get some things off my chest, because there were definitely some moments that went way wrong during our wedding.

So.... fair warning, this is my super long “complainy” post of what went wrong at my wedding a week and a half ago lol! I just really need to get this off my chest so I can get over it and focus on everything that did go well, and also to offer some comfort to other brides who had some snafus during their big day as well. So, if you will please join me, let the complaining begin....

First, we had 4 guests cancel on us the week of the wedding and another 3 just not even show up. I’m a fairly understanding person, but I kid you not, none of these 7 people had any valid reason to cancel on us. Not one. My favorite “excuse” came from my 22 year old cousin who cancelled 3 days before the wedding and who was flying from Pennsylvania to our wedding in California; her excuse, “I failed the Real Estate Licensing exam again, and even though I don’t retake it for another 8 weeks, I really need to take my life into my own hands and study everyday”. Dumbest excuse ever. She has 8 weeks to study, she couldn’t miss 3 days of studying, or ya know, study on the plane? She then wanted me to feel sorry for her that she was out her $400 plane ticket. Why would I feel bad for her? SHE decided to cancel 3 days before for a pretty ridiculous reason; that lost plane ticket is on her, no one else. The other 6 had equally poor excuses themselves. These cancellations were also frustrating because each guest cost us approximately $120. There is sooooo much we could have done with that extra $840! Or we could have put that towards our honeymoon or into Savings. I’m so irritated we literally threw almost a thousand bucks away because of these inconsiderate guests; needless to say, hubby & I have agreed we don’t need to pursue relationships with these 7 people anymore. Really nothing lost there anyway, other than money of course.

Secondly... we also had a handful of guests that missed our ceremony entirely. They showed up just in time for dinner and left immediately after dessert. I kind of felt insulted by this, like they came just for the food. But whatever. I was also very surprised at the number of people that took off right after the cake cutting and didn’t stay for dancing. We already had a relatively small wedding, so having a handful of guests leave so soon made the dance floor feel empty and kind of sad; although, as you'll read at the end of this post, I guess I understand why so many left so soon. I did, however, really enjoy dancing with the friends & family that stayed (especially enjoyed watching my new husband, who NEVER DANCES, tear it up on the dance floor), but there were moments I’d stop and look around and feel kinda sad at how empty the dance floor & ballroom seemed to be. But I’m quickly getting over that.

I also had some big problems with the new in-laws. From my new MIL "sneakily" steal wine from me and my bridal party (even though we all told her several times that wine was reserved for us), to husband's parents & sister just being in bad moods during family photos, to my FIL literally throwing a hissy fit during dinner because he didn’t get to do a toast (even though we told him several times he was not to give a toast at our wedding, but could give one during the rehearsal luncheon if he wanted; we have good reason for not wanting him to toast at the wedding), to MIL being literally the only totally drunk person at the wedding, and ending with the in-laws all sitting at a table after the wedding drinking even more instead of helping the rest of us try to load vehicles up with all of our belongings in the pouring rain. Just adding to the fact they’ve helped with literally nothing with the wedding. I straight up told the hubs that I’m not seeing his family anytime soon. He can visit whenever he wants, but I won’t be going along. I just can’t even believe the behavior they displayed all day long. So rude.

Now, for the grand complaint of them all, our DJ was HORRIFIC. We found Entertainment DJ’s here on Wedding Wire and on Yelp, where they had stellar reviews, especially for DJ Joey. So we booked him! He’s played our venue “2-3 times a month for years” according to him, so he assured us he knew how the venue flowed and where everything should be hooked up, etc. I had a phone meeting with him the week prior as well as dozens of email exchanges where we discussed certain songs and when they should be played, as well as the timeline. This was all apparently for nothing. Right after the wedding party made the grand entrance into the dance area, new hubby and I cut the cake, to which he was supposed to play the song “L-O-V-E”. He had no music playing at first and then dubbed this song in after we cut the cake and were about to feed each other. Then he left the song playing after we were done and everyone was standing around like “okay, now what”. It was 2 very awkward minutes. Then he finally realizes we’re done, and this is where things go ROYALLY WRONG. He invites my husband and his mother to the dance floor. HE COMPLETELY FORGOT MINE AND MY HUSBANDS FIRST DANCE! He skipped right over it and just went to the mother/son dance. As they begin their dance EVERYONE was looking at me with so much confusion, which was so embarrassing. Then 1/4 of the way into their dance, the music just stops. No explanation, nothing, it just stops. The DJ bolts out the front door of our venue and we’re all standing around the room looking confused as heck. I am LIVID at this point. The DJ finally comes back after about 10 minutes and 30 MINUTES LATER he finally restores “power” to continue the music; to which he admitted was his fault, he didn’t connect everything correctly. What was really irritating is that he didn’t explain what was happening; he could have informed us all that there were some technical difficulties and ask that we all go enjoy the photobooth and dessert bar while he resolves the problem, at least we would have known what was going on and we all would have been happy to go occupy ourselves with other activities until he announced it was all fixed. When it was resolved and he comes over to tell my hubby and I that the music is ready to go, I ask if he’s going to let us have our first dance or if he’s just going to completely blow our first dance off? He made up some lame excuse as to how he “always” does the mother/son dance first, then the bride/groom, followed by the father/daughter dance. I sent him our timeline and went over it with him the week of the wedding to which everything clearly stated that we had cake cutting, BRIDE & GROOM first dance (like every freakin’ wedding), then followed by the mother/son and father/daughter dances. But he tried to argue that’s not what my timeline said and when I asked him to pull out his copy of the timeline, low and behold, the timeline said exactly that; Bride and Groom dance FIRST. Duh. Ugh. Anyway... we all finally get our first dances in and in the appropriate order, but by this point many guests had left due to this fiasco, so our dance floor was dismal and kind of sad, but whatever. I ended up enjoying my dance with my new husband and with my dad. The rest of the evening was meh. The DJ had zero energy; he literally just sat behind his DJ table all night. He played a few songs we requested, but most of his song choices were total duds that caused people to stop dancing. Instead of picking up these vibes and changing the song, he just let every song play the whole way through, which was kind of unprofessional in my opinion. If you clearly see a full dance floor become empty due to the song, then change it. This really soured the end of our wedding experience. I’m still so confused and upset over how awful this highly rated DJ ended up being.


That's everything I had to complain about lol thank you all soooo much for letting me get this all off my chest Smiley heart I already feel better!

40 Comments

Latest activity by SB, on October 23, 2018 at 4:40 PM
  • S
    Dedicated September 2019
    Surelle ·
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    Congratulations! But the dj thing is my worst nightmare 😩 I’m sorry that happened! You should think about leaving a review on yelp about the dj!
  • Ingrid
    Super September 2018
    Ingrid ·
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    We had a lot of people leave early in the reception too cause they had 2 ish hours to drive and didn’t get a hotel room in town. So I feel you on that part. I am soooo sorry about your DJ experience. I got lucky with a. great DJ that I kind of found on a whim. But glad your hubby was on the dance floor!! Mine never dances either so I had a similar experience! Smiley smile
  • Mrs. Cohen
    Super October 2018
    Mrs. Cohen ·
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    Yeah the DJ fiasco was completely unexpected, especially since he had 5 star ratings on here and Yelp. I left a long review of everything that went wrong with him on both WW and Yelp; he emailed me immediately asking what more he can do to make things right and to help us take down our reviews. I'm glad he's willing to help more, but the moment's passed and he can't fix our wedding. Not only that, but I kind of don't like that he's almost bribing us; willing to compensate us more if we take our reviews down. Makes me wonder if they refund all negative reviews in an effort to maintain that 5 star rating. So disappointing.

  • Stacy
    Dedicated October 2018
    Stacy ·
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    I'm sorry to hear you had things go wrong but you definitely sound like getting it off your chest will help. At the end of the day, you are married!. Thank you for sharing with us
  • Mrs. Cohen
    Super October 2018
    Mrs. Cohen ·
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    It was so weird... the guests that had an hour+ drive were the ones that stayed until the very end. The ones who lived nearby or had hotels super close to the venue were the ones that all skipped out early lol ugh. Makes no sense. But oh well... just gotta focus on the fun moments had with the hubby dancing his booty off on that dance floor haha

  • Mrs. Cohen
    Super October 2018
    Mrs. Cohen ·
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    Yes, getting this all off my chest definitely helped! (Especially complaining about the new in-laws lol) Thanks for sticking through my long complainy post Smiley laugh

  • Denise
    Devoted May 2019
    Denise ·
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    Wait, there was wine just for the bridal party that you didn’t share with your husband’s mother?
  • Mrs. Cohen
    Super October 2018
    Mrs. Cohen ·
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    Yes. We had a special expensive bottle of wine just for the 4 of us to do toasts. She wasn't even supposed to be in the bridal suite area at that time anyway, she was supposed to be lined up outside to walk down the aisle with her husband and the groom.

  • S
    Dedicated September 2019
    Surelle ·
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    That’s super shady! I bet they do refund the people with negative reviews! I would be really tempted to take that money, I’d also be really tempted to post another review saying he bribed you to remove your first one... that’s so frustrating! I’m so happy that your husband was dancing though and I’m sure it won’t matter much when you look back on the day Smiley smile
  • Vanessasaurus
    VIP June 2019
    Vanessasaurus ·
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    I am so sorry you went through that on your big day! Hopefully venting helps you come to peace with it along with the joy of being married to your love!
  • Kenisha
    Champion June 2019
    Kenisha ·
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    Wowersz. I’d be suing your DJ. He sounds like pure trash. Congratulations on getting married.
  • L
    Dedicated April 2019
    Ley ·
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    Wow! That DJ sounds awful! Definitely leave up your bad review so that other people know!! On the bright side though, you’re married 😊 and hopefully you feel better now that you’ve been able to vent and can focus on the positives.
    I went to a wedding once where the power cut off about 10 minutes into dancing and almost everyone left, including the DJ. Didn’t come back on either. I thought it ended up really sweet because of those of us who did stay, 1 had a guitar that two of them took turns playing and the rest of us karoked lol, but I’m sure it was not at all what the bride and groom would have wanted! So you are not alone with unfortunate music experiences 😉
  • Colleen
    Master September 2019
    Colleen ·
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    The DJ thing bites. Please tell me you got some kind in whine for the wedding guest and it was not just the wedding party drinking whine in front of all the guest. As at every sing wedding. Health problems people with baby sitters long ride someone nor feels n good. As far as you cousin maybe you should make sure they are not depressed. Failing a major test then canceling out of activities you had planned would worry me.
  • Mrs. Cohen
    Super October 2018
    Mrs. Cohen ·
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    Of course there were drinks for everyone. We had an open bar with wine, beer, and champgane that was available to everyone for 5 hours. The special wine toast I had with my bridesmaids was in private, in my bridal suite, before walking down the aisle for the ceremony. It’s not like we were being rude by drinking in front of everyone while they all had water; we were having a special toast before the festivities, that my mother-in-law was not supposed to be part of. At the time of our toast, she was supposed to be lined up with my groom and father-in-law to walk down the aisle; she wasn’t supposed to be in my bridal suite, trying to steal our special wine.
  • E
    Devoted October 2018
    Emma ·
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    Not trying to be facetious, but it sounds like he was on something.

  • Mrs. Cohen
    Super October 2018
    Mrs. Cohen ·
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    Who knows, maybe. Just a shame that whatever the reasoning, it had to impact our wedding so negatively
  • Casey
    Dedicated October 2018
    Casey ·
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    If it makes you feel any better I had 12 people not show and I only had 111 people coming! Most of them were from hubbys side- one uncle and aunt kids had pneumonia which they’re unsure of it it’s true (I’ve never met him in the last 6 years because he always cancels). Another uncle didn’t show up along with his wife. They’re elders and it’s unlike them so we aren’t too upset. The next one is husbands cousins wife, her daughter and her daughters plus one. Wife was there for the rehearsal dinner, but apparently didn’t show because they didn’t have a babysitter for the baby. And their older daughter just got back from Vegas and was too drunk! (Mind you his cousin was one of the groomsman). Another person works for my mother and literally just didn’t show up and still hasn’t said why.. along with her husband. I honestly forget the other people. But yeah it totally sucks and unfortunately a lot of brides know the feeling! To be honest, I plan on contacting a few and making them feel bad about not coming.
  • Casey
    Dedicated October 2018
    Casey ·
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    What made me more mad is we had so many more people we wanted to invite but just didn’t want the numbers high. So if these people were honest and atleast gave us a heads up, we couldn’t invited the others.
  • Chariece & Sterling
    VIP January 2026
    Chariece & Sterling ·
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    Glad you got it off of your chest. The D.J is a ultimate JA because he definitely messed up royally and he knew it. I real Man would have admitted to his mistake no matter how bad it was. But this JA is going argue with you about a timeline that you created. The good thing going forward he will not be involved in you guys life anymore. Unlike your MIL and In-laws hope your relationship with them gets better or at least cordial.
  • Saraí
    April 2019
    Saraí ·
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    I'm shocked right now, a day that is supposed to be the best day of your life turned out to be not so great because of this awful DJ. I'm sorry you had to go through that. I totally understood your point and I support it. Specially the wine part, like they had their own drinks, why take yours? RUDE! anyways, I'm glad you had a great honeymoon and that you're now finally married.

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