Tip jar for the bar?

I would not host an affair that required or enabled my guests to open their wallets for any reason whatsoever and would never allow a tip jar, period. We paid the catering venue ourselves, including all tips.

We paid all catering (servers, bartenders and the bar back) tips the day of the wedding.

We tipped our bartender (very well) at the end of the event. Having a tip jar out just doesn't feel like it would match the level of formality of a wedding (even a casual wedding). We had an open bar, so no cash was ever needed to be exchanged.

I think a tip jar at a private event is a poor reflection of the host that allows it. Your wedding is not a coffee house and your guests are not strangers off the street. We had a top shelf open bar, and our venue included a high percentage for gratuity within service fees. Plus, our guests are like us and tip %50s to start the night (without a jar) so we knew all service professionals were additionally compensated.

How about having a tip jar with a sign saying "Don't tip the bartender. Tips are not needed. But if you must..."?

View Quoted Comment

That only sends mixed messages. Don't have a tip jar. Make sure the bar tenders know they are not to accept tips and to let guests who try tipping know that it's been taken care of.

I am using a tip jar, and I asked her to send me her QR code so that people have a non cash option to tip.

View Quoted Comment Your guests should not have to pay for anything at a privately hosted social event. Tipping the bartender is your responsibility and yours alone.

View Quoted Comment

I will have to respectfully disagree. Not everyone is having the same style wedding. There is always room for alternative and non-traditional ideas.

We are having a small wedding at a friend's lake house. All of my vendors are small and either woman, Veteran or minority owned or contribute in some way to the local community. The bartender is a friend who advised me to do it this way as I am supplying her with all of the alcohol, tools, garnishes, mixers etc. (yes, she is licensed, and yes we purchased insurance with liquor liability added)

According to etiquette, it's not polite to ask your guests to pay for anything at your wedding. I would not use a tip jar.

View Quoted Comment People know to tip without a tip jar. But, if this is a smaller house wedding, why don't you tip the bartender on top of her fee yourself? You're paying her right? Or you can opt for wine and beers only and guests can freely serve themselves and your friend can enjoy the reception instead of working.

We will be tipping the bartender ourselves, but I've been to many weddings at really nice venues where the whole wedding was very tasteful, and there was a tip jar. No one thought anything of it.

While I prefer to tip the bartenders and not have a tip jar out, it's not a crime against humanity to have one and if a couple has a tip jar it doesn't make them redneck heathens, as some people seem to think. Lol.

After the wedding, our maitre d' collected a check with tips for all the staff, including the bartenders. They didn't have a tip jar out for guests and I don't think I've ever seen that at a wedding.

View Quoted Comment Not a crime against humanity, just without taste or poorly informed. I’ve been to weddings in a wide range of pricepoints, sizes, and locations. It would never occur to me to bring cash to a wedding, nor have I ever seen a tip jar. Posting a QR code is even worse and shows the vendor is aware not everyone thinks they needed to bring cash.