rsvp deadline

You shouldn't remind anyone until after the deadline has passed. Depending on how you are having people RSVP, some people put their cards in the mail the day of the deadline so I would give it 2-3 days and then start calling everyone you didn't hear from.

All of those styles or wording would be fine as well but if they did forget, they won't remember to check the website either. I would still call, text or email them. I used FB messenger for my chasing so that I knew for sure they read it.

I would be less concerned about it being rude and more concerned about people showing up without RSVPing. I would definitely reach out or it could be a disaster.

I would still follow-up with people. The last thing you want is unexpected guests, especially if they could've sworn they had already RSVP'd (and just forgot)

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Yes, I planned on waiting until Sunday morning to remind them. We did all RSVP through WW! Some of the people do not have facebook or messanger, so I would not be able to tell if they read it or not. So maybe I can remind them on Sunday with the direct link and if they do not reply by Wednesday, then I can assume they are not coming? We need to give our venue the final headcount and payment by February 1st.

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You're right. I will send out a reminder. So, if I send out a reminder text with the direct link to the RSVP tab on Sunday and they do not reply by Wednesday, then would you assume they were not coming?

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You're right. Thanks

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I wouldn't send a reminder in the first place. You gave a deadline, don't follow up until it passes.

Definitely considering this. If they cant be considerate enough to RSVP yes or no, why am I chasing them down?

What we did was send a text after the deadline passed asking them to RSVP. If we still didn’t get a reply then we sent one more about a week later saying if we didn’t hear anything we would have to count them as a no. I know a lot of people think people should just remember to RSVP but life happens and people forget or they thought you knew they were coming or they thought they told your parents etc etc. Try not to be too hard on people.

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Okay. I am worried that someone who did not RSVP showing up, but we also need to give that final headcount and make our final payment. Sunday would be the day after the RSVP deadline passes, that's why I asked.

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Exactly! Either you want to celebrate with us or you don't. I had some guests at my shower who told us they would RSVP when they got home and that was two weeks ago.!

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Our final headcount and payment is due February 1st, so I cannot send out numerous reminders to guest. I understand that life happens and I've missed RSVP deadlines in the past and was sent a reminder and I did appreciate it and I would RSVP right then and there. I'm trying not too be too hard, but it's stressing me out lol! Thanks

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Trust me Mandi, I feel the same way. But I know this isn't going to go well. A couple of our guests are even so bold as to say "You know we're family, just mark us down as we're coming," or asking questions like why do they need to RSVP, Come on now, silly isn't it? LOL One thing my fiance and I know for being together for 6 years is that nothing that family says is 100%. Not in our situations, any way. Fam that you think will be there for you will be the same ones to be invited to an event, say they're coming, not show up and to add insult to injury not give any explanation. So I'm firmly demanding that it's all great if they want to come, but they need to RSVP online or they're simply not going to be counted.

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This is why we are deciding to really follow up with family! I had people say oh you know I'll be there. Yeah well you said the same thing about our shower and didn't show up! I have friends telling me that having them RSVP is a joke and shouldnt have wasted my paper sending them an invite because they will be there. I said thanks, but I still need you to RSVP and they have not done so. It's very frustration. I just feel like if FH 88 year old grandmother can RSVP online, so could everyone else.

We didn't remind anyone of the deadline, I've never heard of doing that before. I've heard of reaching out after the deadline (which we did). If they haven't RSVPed by now, I'd just wait until after the deadline has passed and reach out. And for sure reach out to all guests. That's just part of a wedding, reaching out to guests that haven't RSVPed. Unless you're okay with people showing up without RSVPing or no shows, I'd reach out to everyone who hasn't responded to confirm. You'll need your final guest count anyway. We had to reach out to 60 people and between me, my husband, his father and my mother, it took us less than half an hour.

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Okay thanks. Maybe I wrote my question out wrong. This is what I'm asking lol. Our final headcount and payment is due February 1st, so we were thinking about reminding guest after Saturday not before. Sending them the RSVP link and giving them two or three days and after that, we would assume they are not coming. I mean with a direct link to the RSVP tab, they should be able to RSVP in 30 seconds.

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Oh, sorry for my confusion. I thought you meant reach out before the RSVP deadline passes to remind them it's coming up. I would send a text, email, facebook message or call to everyone who hasn't RSVPed with the link and just remind them you need your final count. If they don't respond in a few days, you can mark them as a "no".

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Whichever way you choose, I would just make sure that you give them a new deadline and let them know that if they do not respond again, you will have to assume they are not coming and that they will not be included in your final head count to your vendors. Good luck! I hated having to chase people down, it was so frustrating lol

We are having the same issue! I have had several friends and family members tell me "well you know we are coming," and I'm like "No, I don't because you didn't RSVP." We still have two weeks left on ours, and we sent out cards as well as wedding wire as an option. To be honest, most people have mailed back cards and only 4 people have RSVP on our website. Unfortunately, I don't know a lot of my fiancé's family, so I am going to text his mom and dad (who gave me the invite list), and ask them to follow up on the people we haven't heard from while I follow up with my friends and family. I think it would be best to follow up. Sometimes mail actually gets lost, and people do forget.

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I wholeheartedly agree with you, Merline. I think it is actually funny. This is a wedding. Not a simple birthday party. And some do not understand how vital it is for us to actually have the RSVPs. They assume because there a blood relation, they should automatically be counted in. It just doesn't work that way. My grandma said "Andrea, you know me, and so and so are going to be there, do we really have to RSVP?" And I said Yes Grandma, you do. It's awesome you're going to be coming but you still need to go online and RSVP. And she did a few days later. So I'm not changing the RSVPs for anyone. If they do not RSVP, even with a verbal affirmation, they will not be counted.