Hi brides and grooms!
I'd really like your input, please.
Background: I got legally married in a backyard minimony in September of 2019 (with only immediate family present, plus officiant and photographer) and was planning to have a wedding celebration / reception / vow renewal / whatever ya wanna call it in May 2020. We were super open and honest about having legally married in September 2019 with everyone (in conversation, on social media, on wedding website, and on "celebration" invitations). When the pandemic hit, we postponed the May 2020 celebration to June 2021, and we recently cancelled it altogether.
Side note: ideally we'd love to have a vow renewal / anniversary party / whatever in September 2022 if possible, and we actually managed to secure our vendors for a Sept'22 date, but we decided to communicate an outright cancellation to our guests. Rationale: we truly don't know if large indoor, international (a very key component for us) gatherings will be totally safe and carefree by then, and we don't want to keep ourselves (or our guests) on the hamster wheel of "are we planning a wedding, or aren't we?" We figure we will either lose the deposits or be able to put them towards some type of celebration, but we realize it may not look like the wedding we originally planned.
Question: There were a few people who sent us gifts in the Jan/Feb/Mar 2020 timeframe, either for the couples' shower (scheduled for end of March 2020) or for the wedding celebration (scheduled for May 2020)....and both of those events were initially postponed and are now cancelled. We are still married and all, but we have cancelled the "wedding" where we would have hosted these friends and family members. I, personally, feel the need to refund our guests for the gifts that were clearly in anticipation of the wedding celebration we wanted to host (please note: they did not send us the gifts after our Sept'19 backyard wedding, but rather a few months before the May'20 reception was to occur). Of course it's not our fault that a pandemic upended our plans, but it's not their fault either. We have used the non-cash gifts since since then, of course, but my intent would be to refund them (either return the cash amount to them in the case of cash gifts, or look up the price of the item on the registry if non-cash). I want to be very careful to not offend anyone, though. So I'm reaching out to the WeddingWire community!
TLDR: Would you be offended if a bride & groom refunded you for gifts for a reception they've had to cancel due to covid? Or would you understand and think it's considerate?
Thank you for reading my post, and thank you in advance for your input!
Allie
