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Grace
Super February 2022

Rethinking wedding day timeline - 2pm start?

Grace, on April 25, 2021 at 10:05 AM Posted in Planning 0 10
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Hello all! I need some advice. Background info is we are getting married on 2/22/2022 which is a Tuesday. Most of our guests are driving to and from our wedding on the same day so we didn't want to plan anything too late in the evening. Most of those who are driving have a 2-3 hr drive.



I also have family in New Zealand and want to make it possible for them to watch the ceremony online. I am the first grandchild on that side of the family to get married so I know my Nan will want to see it (or at least video call before or after the ceremony). However, 12pm Eastern time USA would be 6am New Zealand time! I'm thinking of shifting my timeline by at least an hour, possibly more, to accommodate for the time difference. Ceremony will probably only last for 30 minutes and I was originally planning to open the buffet immediately following, while we were doing family and bridal photos.

Questions: If I have a 1:30pm or 2pm start for the ceremony, should we offer food beforehand? Do I need apps or should we just open the buffet early? Will people have eaten lunch or will they be expecting to be fed right away? Coffee, Tea, and Hot Chocolate will be provided for the full length of the ceremony and reception due to the time of year and unpredictability of the weather.

10 Comments

Latest activity by Grace, on April 25, 2021 at 7:02 PM
  • V
    Rockstar July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    I don't think you need to offer food beforehand. My brother's wedding was at 2 pm and they had the ceremony followed by cocktail hour then the reception. Appetizers and drinks were served during cocktail hour which is usually how it is done. I think the more concerning part is that you are expecting guests to travel 2-3 hours one way on a Tuesday for a wedding. That doesn't seem convenient for anyone especially if you plan on serving alcohol because then you'd be enabling your guests to drink then drive.

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  • F
    Expert April 2022
    Fred ·
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    Hello Grace.
    Sometimes the cocktail hour is held before the ceremony. It's more common than you think!

    I really think that offering them appetizers or hors d'œuvres with drinks before the ceremony is not a big deal, however: "Will people have eaten lunch or will they be expecting to be fed right away?" You should ask them.

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  • Catherine
    Expert March 2023
    Catherine ·
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    My concern is also getting married in the middle of the week with your guests driving there and back the same day. That might lead to accidents when you’re serving alcohol or less guests showing up since that’s 6 hours of driving time in a day. My future in laws live five hours away and I can’t imagine asking them to even drive one way of that the day I get married. Can you move the wedding to a Friday, which is still a cheaper day fo get married and push the ceremony back to 3pm or 4pm? I understand wanting the cool date of 2/22/22. But you should also think of the convenience and safety of your guests.
    Regardless, you can serve a lot of appetizers during your cocktail hour or dinner or lunch right after the ceremony if you’ve already taken pictures. If you don’t want to take photos with your new husband, serve lunch right away. But I would hold off on serving lunch right after the ceremony if you want to take pictures with your husband as usually lunch or dinner starts when the couple can sit down and eat as well.
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  • Grace
    Super February 2022
    Grace ·
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    I appreciate your advice on the food and hear your concerns. We are not changing the date or location. All of our immediate family and VIP's live closeby but the rest of our friends scattered to different parts of the state. One group who are traveling are older family members of mine who do not drink. They own a charter bus company and frequently drive long distances. The other group are my FH friends who all work in DC and always carpool together when they visit. A number of people won't be able to come because of the date and we expect that. Our VIP's were involved in picking the date and will be there.
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  • Grace
    Super February 2022
    Grace ·
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    Thanks for the advice, Fred! Yes, sometimes I get so caught up in my thoughts I forget that I can just ask people directly. I guess I needed the reminder!
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  • Grace
    Super February 2022
    Grace ·
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    Hi Catherine. I appreciate your advice on holding off on food until we can join our guests.



    Unfortunately, it is literally twice as expensive at our venue on a Friday and even more expensive on Saturday or Sunday. Our VIP's live close and have committed to coming on a Tuesday.

    I am not so worried about drinking and driving since one group of people traveling usually carpool when they visit us. Some non-drinkers in that group and they have come to town for day trips in the past. The other group are older family members of mine who don't drink much and can also carpool. That side of the family owned a charter bus company and frequently drives long distances in one day.
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  • M
    Expert September 2021
    Marianne ·
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    I think starting at 2pm (8am NZ time, correct?) would be perfect! If your guests are coming from 2-3 hours away, they'll probably eat breakfast beforehand or grab something on the road, which should hold them over until 2:30ish. Personally, I'd offer some appetizers while you're taking photos and then open the buffet when you're done and ready to join them. Assuming your ceremony is 30 minutes and reception is 4 hours, that'll put you until about 6:30pm, which seems reasonable to me for those driving back the same day Smiley smile

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  • Grace
    Super February 2022
    Grace ·
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    Great. That is exactly what I was imagining but I wasn't sure if it was realistic or not. Thanks, Marianne!
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  • Catherine
    Expert March 2023
    Catherine ·
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    Perfect! Sounds like you have it figured out then. I would push back the start time into la little later in the morning for New Zealand. Maybe if you get married at 3:30 asking her to watch at 9:30am her time isn’t too early and she’ll probably already be awake. You can have a ton of appetizers for cocktail hour during photos and serve an early dinner as soon as photos are over.
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  • Grace
    Super February 2022
    Grace ·
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    Also a great option! I will check in with the others involved and see their opinion on timing and food. Depending on who we pick as our caterer that might also help us decide if a late lunch or early dinner is the better fit. Thanks!
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