Rehearsal Dinner Invites?

Oooo good question. That's tough but I think you're OK to just invite people and spouses that are involved in the actual ceremony. That's a good objective line in the sand so to speak that shouldn't cause any hurt feelings.

I would just do those involved in the ceremony with plus 1’s. If you start to do the cousin’s mom and sister then you’d have to think about inviting other aunts and uncles. If you just do those participating in the ceremony then it’s a clear line of who is invited and who is not. My fiancé’s older brother is a groomsmen but his 2 older sisters are not in the wedding, therefor they are not invited to the rehearsal dinner because it is only going to be those involved in the ceremony.

We struggled with this too, because he's got two young cousins in the wedding party (as ringbearer and flowergirl) so we're inviting them, their parents (Fh's aunts and uncles) and they each have one sibling (so two families of 4). We were stuck then on whether we needed to invite his other aunts and uncles and their families, and if we did that, then would we need to invite my uncles and their families. It would take it from 38 people (officiant, wedding party, their dates, parents & grandparents & us) to 65 people. And since his parents are paying for it, we asked their opinions, they said no, so we're keeping it at the 38.

We also have a lot of people traveling for it so we knew we didn't want to just include anyone who travels, and instead I'm looking into a space at the hotel for like a welcome party after the rehearsal dinner.

I wouldn’t add the extras. Those involved the ceremony and their spouses/dates is all you need.

Don't add the extras. You only invite parents as part of the familial unit if the attendant is a minor child.


Also, your FH doesn't want to add them, it's his family, and his parents are paying.

In our circles, only those involved in the ceremony and their significant others are invited, along with parents/siblings and the officiant. A welcome party for traveling guests is not done because they are not participating in the rehearsal itself. Hosting guests is what the reception is for. Also there is a misconception that the rehearsal dinner must be expensive at a fancy restaurant when a number of couples order pizza delivery or go in to the casual restaurant to sit down with sodas and beer.

Only invite immediate family and those involved in the ceremony (and spouses/partners, of course). I would not invite the Best Man's mom or sister. If you had a flower girl or ring bearer then it would make sense to invite their family since they are still a child. The godmothers' kids are adults so I probably wouldnt invite them. Does that make sense?

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Totally! Everyone already on the list seemed pretty straightforward, but I hadn't seen anything on the protocol with adult kids. Thanks for the help everyone!