Reception Alcohol Feedback

My honest truth... As a guest, who doesn't like beer or wine, but likes seltzers, would notice and feel a little annoyed. It's not a BIG deal - but, I'd wonder why some people are allowed it and other's aren't. I think you should just add it to the menu - people will appreciate it

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Thanks Viviana! I'm just wanting to make sure everyone's happy and looked after, so this was helpful!

While you have good intentions, it is rude to give the wedding party privileges that the rest of the guests don’t have. People do it anyway because they don’t care. Many examples include having a cake for cutting and guests are not offered any cake, the couple gets a higher end meal than the rest of the guests, and the list goes on. Your guests will never say to you that they are offended but they will talk among themselves. Just host everyone equally. If someone doesn’t like the beer/wine selection, they will go for whatever nonalcoholic beverages you have available.

I would probably notice. If I saw them I would probably ask for one at the bar and if I was told no I would think it’s a bit strange.


When it comes to options for guests I will always say if you can afford it, do it.

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Thanks for the feedback Michelle, we def. don't want to be rude and weren't trying to be!

As someone who decided to go with a full bar with liquor because the two of us only drink liquor and felt wrong only allowing guests to have beer or wine in a similar situation, I'd say add a seltzer if you can afford to. It might not be super noticeable to others, but I do feel like it gives a good option for guests who don't like beer or wine and may not want your signature cocktail. If you guys decide against it I don't think it'll be a big deal at all, just a nice addition if you decide to.

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Thanks Lauren! We'll probably only be able to afford one flavor option of one brand though.

Which makes me bring up another question. Say BMs bring a variety back of white claws, but we only have Black Cherry for the guests. Would you be upset that they were drinking a different flavor?

It's a lot lol, I'm just wanting to try and avoid any negative feelings!

As a guest, I would definitely notice if the bridal party was drinking something that wasn't being offered to everyone else, even if using a koozie. I would be annoyed because this is quite rude... Also, why are bridal party members bringing their own drinks to begin with?

From a guest perspective, if I saw that only wine, beer, and a signature cocktail were being served at the bar and I saw the bridal party drinking other things, I would also be super confused. Like, I'd wonder "did I miss that there were seltzers or did they run out of seltzers" and I'd probably ask the person who I saw holding the seltzer where they got it. Awkward... My opinion is that if you don't want to provide seltzers for the rest of the guests, then don't allow the bridal party to drink them in the first place. There is nothing wrong with providing beer and wine only--but what IS wrong is not providing the same thing to all guests.

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Thanks Jessi! I appreciate the feedback!

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The venue owner said it was an option, and my bridesmaids liked the idea because it took some financial burden off of FH and I. Wasn't our choice, they just said they'd like to bring their own if they were allowed to, and the venue owner said that was more than fine.

Thanks for your feedback!

View Quoted Comment Flavor wouldn’t bother me. These are some very specific rules! What’s the difference if buying variety packs vs one flavor. I feel like venues just like to mess with people sometimes haha

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Well if they want to that's fine, but I'd make sure to ask them specifically what types of seltzers they're planning on bringing beforehand so that you can make sure that you provide the same ones to guests! It will still take some of the financial burden off of you because you won't have to provide as much

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Okay thank you! lol It's not a rule, I was just wondering!

We'd just be able to afford one flavor for ALL of our guests, but since the venue owner said our bridal party is allowed to bring their own the night before to be chilled, I know a couple of my bridesmaids would have a different flavor that they prefer that wouldn't be the option for our guests.

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Sounds good. If they have a different flavor then I can just ask them to place them in the fridge in the bridal suite and they can go get it from there where the other guests can't see. I know at least 2 of them like the newer flavors that aren't super popular, so we're just trying to make everyone happy!

View Quoted Comment I was also confused with if you are going to go ahead with the hard seltzer why you have to stick with one flavor (one brand I understand) when there are so many variety packs.

View Quoted Comment Vendors and venues are out to make money off of customers so they don’t put manners on their priority list

Any time you treat groups of guests differently you run the risk of hurting feelings or confusing your guests. The bar you have sounds great, if you want to add one selzer go ahead, but I would ask the wedding party not to bring their own.

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We thought it would be safer to just do one flavor instead of a variety pack. We didn't want all of one flavor being ordered and the rest not touched and us being out a ton of money and going home with a flavor of seltzer that I won't drink!

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Thanks for your feedback. If the bridal party brings the same flavor then I don't mind them doing it because they've expressed that they want to help FH and I out with expenses. That's just how our group is, and they'll likely show up with it even if we say not to, and not to be rude, just simply out of kindness and to try and help out.

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I'm confused as to how the venue or vendor would make money off of this?? The venue owner gave that as an option to help US with the cost because our bridal party is wanting to contribute to the alcohol cost. I'm just trying to see where/how the venue owner or vendor would gain from this?