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Alyssa
Dedicated September 2024

No Registry-rather do Honeymoon fund/cash only

Alyssa, on November 1, 2023 at 1:28 AM Posted in Registry 0 6
I hate to ask the question, but I seriously don’t think I need a registry. I’ve asked my friends and family and my friends think I’m weird for not wanting to have registry. My family and his family aren’t opposed to the cash funds but still says we should put some stuff on an Amazon registry. But here’s the thing, I don’t need anything, and my partner doesn’t need anything. We don’t have enough space for anything new. We will pretty much have everything we need before our reception happens. I already don’t wanna do a bridal shower because there is no point. The only gift I would even want would just be cash or gift cards. The cash actually useful, because who knows when we will move again, need something else, or just want to save. Everything I have and everything my partner has is nice. There’s stuff I’d like someday, but we currently don’t own a home yet so there’s no point in asking for certain items. So I guess my question is, can I get away with just a cash or honeymoon fund? I legit don’t know what to put on registry.

6 Comments

Latest activity by CM, on November 21, 2023 at 9:27 PM
  • H
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
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    If you don’t need anything, you can just skip the registry. If anyone asks, you can say “oh, we have everything we need for our apartment and are saving up for a house.” They should get the hint. You can skip the cash/honeymoon fund registries entirely. At best, they charge a percentage fee for being the middle man. At worst, some folks are put off and offended by them. If you don’t register, most people get the hint and know that cash is always a good gift. If someone insists on throwing you a shower, and you truly want one, you can do a recipe shower or something like that (everyone brings a card with their favorite recipe on it).
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  • C
    CM ·
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    I agree with all of this.

    OP there's really no polite way for a couple who is apparently in need of nothing to ask their guests for money. Honeymoon registries are deceptive to many as they just cut a check that can be used for anything at all. Plus a honeymoon is a vacation and your own responsibility, no one else's to pay for.

    Registries themselves are only narrowly approved of in the etiquette world, and not by traditional etiquette at all, because they are supposedly the couple's own reference list of things they need. Guests have to look them up on third party platforms such as a store or wedding website or ask a close friend or relative if they know where you're registered. There is no possibility of polite spin with a cash registry.

    There's no need to register at all in your case, nor is there anything weird about that. If people ask where you're registered, you can use the line that PP suggests, that you have everything you need/ are saving for a move etc.

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  • Cece
    Rockstar October 2023
    Cece ·
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    Perfectly said
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  • P
    Devoted April 2023
    Peyton ·
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    Would you consider asking guests to make a donation to one of your favorite charities? You could include links to these charities. This gesture generates money for the less fortunate and I think would also tell your guests that you have all that you need. I could be wrong, but I think, people would get the hint and donate money to a charity AND gift you with money …I know I would

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  • M
    Just Said Yes August 2024
    Meggan ·
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    My sister just did a honeymoon fund but had a backup registry for her bridal shower and for whoever wanted to give an actual gift. You can also set up a cash fund for people to purchase different activities for your honeymoon like a sunset cruise, massage, rental car etc.
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  • C
    CM ·
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    Admirable as this gesture sounds, unfortunately it's still inappropriate. If you want to donate to charity that's great, but you can't properly direct people to donate money on your behalf. A wedding isn't a fundraiser. That aside, if someone asked for donations to charity I don't know anyone who would give to both the couple and the charity. It's meant to be in place of a gift that benefits the couple.

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