No kid reception issue...

I think it’s fine to only include the children in the wedding and immediate family members’ children (siblings or nieces/nephews would count for this).

Yep, you can do that! The best suggestion I have seen is the RSVP cards that say "___ Seats have been reserved in your honor."

I think it's fine to invite only some children.

In your case I think is best to hire a babysitter for those traveling here with the kids. This takes the kids out of the reception and guarantee they’ll be able to assist and have fun. If you allow them to bring kids and not your family then there’ll be some drama here and there.

I think if you're going to allow kids, you should allow kids. This would be a potential source of drama in my family, if I only allowed some kids. If it's a budget thing, they may offer kids plates at a discount. For our wedding, it is $155 per adult aand only $25 for a child. We are having a beach wedding with open bar for 9 hours and a bonfire. Our wedding is 4pm-1am. So, not exactly a "kids event". But, we are welcoming everyone. We are renting a "kids room" at the villa where the wedding is. I'm just going to leave it up to the guests to decide for themselves. I'm not going to stress over it

This whole no kids thing makes people truly salty. I would just speak to people who are local and ask if they can find babysitters for their kids and the only kids allowed are those from out of town guest who don't have a choice. Or throw in the towel and say sure to kids. I took the latter stance cause it wasn't worth the headache for me.

View Quoted Comment I wouldn't leave my kids with a babysitter I or they didn't know, in a foreign country especially. But, that's just me. Trust me, I always thought I'd have an adults only wedding. But, now that it's actually happening. We want to celebrate with everyone we love, and if that means with their kids then so be it. Our wedding is also an international destination wedding so everyone will be traveling to it.

We decided that if they're 12 and under they're not invited

Also, sorry to keep responding lol..
if you go the babysitter route, consider renting sitter(s) and having a room or kids place at the event or on the same property/ at the wedding venue so that parents can go check on their kids and are close by in case of anything. This way the parents are close by but kids are not at the reception/wedding itself. Like if it's at a hotel, renting a room or suite for the babysitter(s) and all the kids. You could have food or snacks and games/activities there for the kids so it could be fun for them too. Like a kids camp or daycare..

I would make sure to invite in circles. If you're allowing his siblings to bring kids, then you shoudl allow your siblings to bring kids. You don't need to invite more than that.

You certainly can have immediate family children only. But if you have out of town guests with children (other than FH's family) don't mention that his nieces/nephews are coming because they're all from out of town! Just keep affirming that it's immediate family children only.

View Quoted Comment THIS! Circles is key, and keeping things even. You don’t need to invite every kid but you should definitely invite the ones from each side with the same relationship. (Ie if inviting nieces and nephews from one side, I think it’s important to include nieces and nephews from the other side — do exclude them would be hurtful). But circles are appropriate. We included our nieces and nephews, but didn’t extend the circles any further (so we did NOT invite any of our cousins’ many children) and that was fine. Everyone understood the relationship line.

View Quoted Comment This was my concern. I only have 4 nieces and nephews from my 2 siblings (15, 13, 5 and 11 months and I'm getting married in 2021 so they'll be older by then) so they'll all be invited, and all are in my wedding party. His siblings all have kids under the age of 6. So my worry was my cousins kids. Them being upset at "no kids" yet heres his 7 nieces and nephews running around.

It makes sense to just let kids who are in the wedding party to come. However, if you start inviting other kids, that's when it gets different. If your FH's siblings kids are allowed to come, it's polite to allow your siblings to bring theirs. If you think that you can explain it to them, they will understand and not be insulted, then it's fine, but it's polite to invite kids in circles.

One thing you can do is hire a babysitter to take the kids to another room and play games, watch a movie. I saw this at a wedding and it was great for the parents.

View Quoted Comment

Like PP said, invite in circles, if you explain that you're inviting in circles they should understand. If they don't it's their problem and you shouldn't worry about that. It's your wedding and you shouldn't feel forced to do something you don't want to just to please others.

View Quoted Comment This is exactly what we’re doing at our wedding.

I was just invited to a no kid wedding and had to end up being a no show because my sitter dropped out last minute. We felt awful but also more annoyed, cuz we spent money on our outfits to not be able to go. I think no kids is silly. My opinion tho. I had no kids at my baby shower and I regret that, I just know how guest respond to that. So just be prepared for some no shows probably.

We are having an adults' only event as well. Hire a babysitter and have a separate kids' room-because WEDDINGS FOR KIDS ARE BORING!!!

The reason kids ruin weddings is because they are bored. They get restless and start fidgeting with your expensive centerpieces you spent hours DIY'ing or running around and making noise during speeches.

I'm sure you can but i would say if some can bring kids then its better if everyone has the option. i find that most people that don't have to bring them - wont. I'm having an out of state wedding so everyone attending from both sides have to travel. most aren't even bringing their children. plus like PP said, children's plates cost significantly less. Mine is $25 for kids.

Inviting nieces and nephews only is absolutely fine and I wouldn't have an issue with that.