My fiancé wants a wedding cake from Kroger’s

If his family is offering to pay for the cake with food stamps, it sounds like they don't really have the money to get it elsewhere. If that's not what you want, that's perfectly fine but you should pay for it yourself. It sounds like they're helping the best way that they can.

Are you annoyed with the fact your wedding cake is coming from the grocery store or that his sister will be using food stamps?

We are using our local grocery store's bakery for our cake. They are actually known for it and it's SUPER affordable. I honestly do not think anyone will think twice about using Kroger as a vendor if you are worried about that.

If this is about the food stamps paying for it.. then I would politely say that she needs to use her food stamps to take care of herself, not to take care of your wedding and you pay for the cake.

His sister should be feeding her family with the government assistance, not your wedding guests. It seems like borderline fraud in my opinion as well.

Pay for the cake yourself. Do you want to have that over your heard if she can't afford her other groceries?

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I agree with all of this. Even with us getting the less expensive cupcake option our baker is charging $250 to feed 50 people. We are lucky enough to have the money to pay for our entire wedding ourselves, but that is a lot of money that could be better spent were we in a different situation. I enjoy some grocery store cakes and see nothing wrong with them if they taste good and look nice.

If the problem is the food stamps, I would politely decline with your thanks. She'll probably appreciate that you would rather she spend that on her household.

View Quoted Comment I’m annoyed that he told his sister to pay for it opposed to his parents or grandparents. His grandma paid for his sisters wedding. Bc I know his sister can’t afford it and I’m annoyed it would be coming from a grocery store when his cousin owns a bakery. Sorry important details I left out. Lol

View Quoted Comment Thank you! You and everyone else have been really helpful. No I don’t. I think I will tell him to ask his parents and grandparents. Because my siblings didn’t pitch in for anything. It was a selfish gesture from her but I agree I have better options

View Quoted Comment Thank you for your advice! Yeahh it’s crazy prices for cake. But I hate grocery store bakery items. And a wedding cake is a huge task that could easily be messed up. Honestly, I don’t have much faith in that option. Between delivery, dryness, customizing. If it was a regular cake, cookies, cupcakes that’s fine. However I think my biggest issue was he asked his siblings opposed to his parents and grandparents who helped with his sisters wedding in the past. And that his cousin owns a bakery. Who I was told could provide the cake.

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I know weddings are expensive, but is there a reason he needs to ask his parents instead of the two of you buying it? No one is obligated to help pay for your wedding no matter what they may have previously funded, circumstances can always change.

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I agree with this. You shouldn't be upset that his parents aren't paying for it, no one is obligated to pay for your wedding except you and your FH.

View Quoted Comment No there is no major reason. They keep saying how can they help. And I figured the cake is one of the cheaper categories to fund. His parents don’t have any financial issues they are stable and well off. He just hates uncomfortable conversations about money. So he chooses to not bring it up. So maybe my issue is more with my fiancé than anything. Because he’s happy to ask me about how much my family is putting in. Yeahh the issue isn’t the cake. It’s me funding a lot and him sitting back comfortably. Haha wow. I’m think really deep now

I’m curious as to why his sister would be paying for your wedding.

I had had a similar timeline and budget. I couldn’t afford a traditional wedding cake and instead went for a non-traditional cake that significantly less.

Your FSIL needs to feed her family with her government assistance. Save up for your own wedding cake or cut from another area. You can also go cakeless and offer a small dessert table.

View Quoted Comment 100% true. I believe my issue is with my fiancé the more that I think about it. He keep saying oh Yeahh my parents and grandparents paid for this and this in my sisters wedding so I said oh why don’t you ask them to pay for the cake. He comes back and said well I asked my sister and she wants to use food stamps. I’m like this so so random.

View Quoted Comment Lol my thoughts exactly I have NO IDEA why he asked his sister. My sibling didn’t even pay for big purchases like that. I told him to ask his parent bc his mom said a family member owns a bakery. But he doesn’t like to talk about money with his parents. Idk maybe pride or awkwardness so he asked his siblings.

And i I agree his sister needs to take care of her family.

Have the wedding you can afford.

View Quoted Comment Ahhh!

i would just focus on getting it yourself. It sounds like he doesn’t want his family paying for anything. If you need recommendations for more affordable desserts there are many posts on here or you can ask 🙃

Kroger's whippy icing cake is the slam. My sister just got a Kroger cake for my niece's birthday party this weekend and oooh come to momma!

That being said, she shouldn't be using food stamps for your wedding. That 100% is fraud. But unless his family offered to help in some way I'd just make plans to pay for your own cake in this scenario.

View Quoted Comment Lol “is the slam” makes me question your judgement lol jk ☺️ But I think he probably put her in an uncomfortable position to say that. It’s pretty extreme.

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Honestly I've been fantasizing about birthday cake for two weeks because of the September birthdays in my family. Ha!

I agree she probably felt like she couldn't so made that offer without thinking about what she was saying.

Why don’t you just ask his parents? If they own a bakery just put in an order. If they want to help fine if not then pay them for it. When my fiancé forgets to put in an order at his bakery I just call and do it myself lol

I actually think that's not a bad option. There's a ton of brides here who have used a grocery store wedding cake and it comes out looking nice. I even considered a Walmart one once to save on the price. I do however think it shouldn't be bought with food stamps.