Honeymoon Funds... Rude or Not Rude?

Its entirely your decision. I plan on using it because I already have household items.

Most WW users find honeyfunds to be rude and I agree. A "subtle hint" that you need financial assistance would be not registering. Your guests know that cash is a good gift without you explicitly asking for it.

Honeyfunds are also somewhat deceiving since they make your guests believe that they're gifting you a fishing excursion or a nice couples massage for your honeymoon when, in fact, they're just sending that money to your bank account.

There's really no need to go through a middle man for guests to give you money. If you don't register, them guests will most likely get the hint that you want money and bring cash or checks to the wedding.

View Quoted Comment I personally don’t agree with it being decieving. It’s up to the couple to book said excursion with that money. If honeyfund directly sent the money to the site the price and fee (cheaper than sales tax on an item) would sky rocket and there would not be nearly as many offerings as there are. Yes it goes to the couples bank account but when the couple created the account and selected what they would like to do that was their agreement saying if this is purchased, the funds must go to X and it is their responsibility to honor that agreement.

I have heard that if you dont do a registry then guests will assume that you just want cash. My fh and I live together already so we wont be doing a traditional registry.

I just put a note on our wedding website that we’d love donations toward our honeymoon but also included a link to a registry for anyone who wants to get us an actual gift. My registry has less than ten items, though, so people know we mostly want money lol

I decided not to do a Honeyfund or anything similar bc I didn’t want any of the donations to go toward payment of that service.... I think most people still do wedding cards? So they can just give you money in the card 👍🏽

Completely up to you and I think opinions on this differ by crowd. I think they’re fine and have contributed as a guest many times. I think not registering anywhere is hint enough that you would appreciate cash as a gift.

Our honeymoon location offered a registry directly on their site. There was a small fee but we chose to pay for that so our guests don’t have to. We chose to do this bc we already have many household items so we didn’t register for that many things. I’m sure my older relatives won’t contribute but we wanted to give our younger relatives and friends the option to give us a gift that would contribute to an experience rather than a physical gift. We will book these excursions no matter what so I don’t feel like I’m asking someone to pay for my honeymoon for me. I have the money saved but it would be a nice gift to not have to use it all.

If you use Zola you can choose to absorb the fee so you’re guests aren’t paying it. Since a shower is being planned, I felt the need to have a registry with some physical gifts. Zola lets you organize your registry so you can put things you really want at the top, so we put different things for our honeymoon on top and the physical gifts below. I know for some friends when I learned about the fee honeymoon funds charge, I decided just to give them a check. I think as these get more popular, many guests will just do that.

I find it rude to ask for just honeymoon money. But i think if you dont register for anything then people would get the hint you want money

We’re doing that. I think now a days people just give money as gifts anyways. Plus we’ve been living together for years so there’s nothing we need for the house. We haven’t registered for anything so I figured people will get the hint to just give money. At least I hope lol. It’s your wedding so do what you think works best for you.

View Quoted Comment This! We’ve been living together going on 4 years. There’s nothing we need. My thought with a honeymoon fund is if you want to contribute $10 thank you so much. I find registries a little forward because not everyone can afford a $100 whatever. I think it’s true that it depends on the crowd.

I agree 100%. Don’t think it’s rude at all. Plus you bring up an excellent point about registries and gifts there being too expensive.

Since most couples live together before marriage, it’s becoming more and more common to see honeymoon funds. I love them because then I can give money and it’s going towards something I know the couple wants. We plan on doing that for our registry as well. It’s not mandatory to give money through there so if people don’t want to go that route, they can always bring cash. I rather have the honeymoon fund that getting physical things we don’t need.

We didn’t do a honeymoon fund and got all cash/check in cards at our wedding.

We did a Honeyfund. Had 2 people say they usually don’t gift when people have them but since it was us they would make an exception 🙄. We were leaving the day after our wedding (on a Sunday) so we didn’t want a lot of cash/checks to deal with. It was nice to have the gifts in advance to books things for our trip. Husband and I decided we didn’t care if someone thought it was tacky and didn’t gift because all of our family and friends understood why we were doing it/our current living situation.

We registered because of having a bridal shower but we didn’t advertise it outside of that. We got 6 gifts (not from the registry) and the rest was cash or check. It worked out wonderfully for us and our guests didn’t have to deal with the extra fee!

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You had two people actually tell you that? That is so surprising and super rude. That's a fantastic point though-- if you're planning on hopping on a plane any short time after the wedding, the timing of running to the bank sounds like it could be very stressful.

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I love this idea. And if we receive legit cards, I think there's an added sentimental value.

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I personally think honeyfunds are rude and I never contribute to them. I normally do not gift cash to friends as it feels like an admission fee to a wedding and truthfully it feels awkward (comparing what friends gave amoungst each other). Also, I know that that my money could go into your utility bills instead of your "spa visit", and I find the whole concept misleading. If your from a part of the country where cash is already common, its probably less weird (but I don't think you need to register to get cash, and its the classier way of doing things).

I think this poster made good points. It always irritates me, how many brides/grooms chose not to pick up the service fees for those who opt to contribute to their honeyfund. If you are flat out asking for cash, dont charge your guests the service fee.

I think the ideal situation though if you must do one, is to also set up a small registry of physical things (esp if you are having a shower). You can do this right through Zola and it will please people who do not want to gift just cash.