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Just Said Yes December 2021

Hate my wedding photos

Sarah, on December 8, 2021 at 4:25 AM Posted in Married Life 2 7
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Hi everyone,
I’m looking for advice on what to do as I keep dwelling on things that went wrong with my wedding. I had a very diy wedding that I planned for 1.5 years. A lot of things went right and overall I had a very fun day but I am pretty disappointed in my bridal party photos. Mostly we didn’t get any fun candid shots, mostly just smiling at the camera. The group photos with bridesmaids and groomsmen are absolutely horrible, impossible to see everyone, too crowded together. Part of the issue is we were rushed before the wedding because 1 of the two makeup artists I hired no showed and then it rained between ceremony and reception and that hindered photos. My photographer also cropped the photos weird so a lot of them, including family portraits, are from waist up. I had a flowy ball gown that I really would have liked not cropped out! I asked my photographer for Uncropped photos and she claims she doesn’t have any. I paid a lot of money for this photographer who came highly recommended with stellar reviews, so I don’t get it.

The only reason I’m satisfied with bride and groom portraits is because we did a second post bridal session with another photographer after the wedding.
My hair was also messed up with a few pieces out of place. i spent money on photo shop and I’m able to photoshop those out, but it’s sad I have to do that. I wish someone would have pointed out the messed up hair. There was a piece stuck in the veil, looks terrible.
My makeup was also sub par in my opinion. I could have done it better myself (as I did for post bridal session). The moms forgot to wear their corsages too so those are not in photos.
I am extremely picky but I feel like so much went wrong! Basically weather (which is okay- I can’t control the rain), but hair, makeup, photos all did not meet expectations. I spent so much time and money on this wedding it’s so hard to look past all the flaws, especially because I blame other people. My Dj was also not great lol.
Anyone have any suggestions for how to move on? It’s been six months. I did have a blast overall on my wedding day and a lot of these problems (Ie photo disappointment) have come up after

7 Comments

Latest activity by Al, on September 19, 2023 at 12:21 PM
  • Cece
    Rockstar October 2023
    Cece ·
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    It sounds like you had a great time at your wedding, then began nitpicking little things later. You said you planned for a year and a half and were very DIY… maybe you are experiencing post-wedding blues now that everything is over. I would suggest pursuing a new hobby or project to fill that void; and also to stop reflecting on the few little things that didn’t go perfectly. It doesn’t sound as though anything was a disaster by any means… just that you had incredibly specific expectations that weren’t met. Nobody’s wedding goes absolutely perfect, and it sounds as though yours was overall a positive experience! It’s important to remember a wedding is a party on just one day….. a marriage is every day for the rest of your life. The wedding day is over and it’s time to move forward with the rest of your marriage… don’t remain stuck reflecting on one day in the past.
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  • Heather
    Super November 2021
    Heather ·
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    Sarah,
    Congrats on getting married! I'm sorry you feel this way about your photos.

    What I suggest is to just let it be and be grateful! It definitely is easier said than done, but bear with me as I explain Smiley smile

    While I'm sure you had high expectations for your photos be grateful that you married the love of your life, be grateful that you were able to have a wedding especially still being in a pandemic, be grateful that you are healthy, be grateful that your wedding was amazing, and be grateful that you were able to DIY a lot of stuff to save money. It really is a mindset thing and that's why you are still feeling the way that you do. When you have a heart filled with gratitude it changes your mindset.

    I used to care SO much about EVERYTHING. It honestly ruined me because it drained me physically, mentally, and spiritually. But ever since I turned to changing my attitude to gratitude I was able to let go and just be happier.

    If you truly want to get your mind off of it then you can start doing other activities! Focus on Christmas (if you celebrate it). Decorate, plan Christmas activities with family and friends, shop, etc. Even look into new hobbies.

    Again, it's definitely a mindset thing so in order for you to let go you have to focus on something else or shift your thinking. In this case be grateful Smiley smile

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  • Natalie
    Super November 2020
    Natalie ·
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    With the internet, social media, magazines, etc., I think it’s hard for us to remember that our weddings and photos are a real-life event and not just stages photoshoots put on for appearances. The pictures we see of weddings as we plan are pictures of professional models taken by magazine photographers and editors. I had the same reaction you did when I initially saw my wedding photos! After a little bit of time, I realized that 1. I will always be a thousand times more critical of my pictures because they are of me 2. Most photos will never be seen by anyone other than my husband and me, and the ones framed and displayed in our home will be our favorites of us!
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  • Michelle
    Dedicated November 2021
    Michelle ·
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    I totally understand how you are feeling… the morning of our wedding we found out that our original photographer was stuck in Mexico and wouldn’t be able to make it back for our wedding. They found us a new photographer, but it wasn’t the same. This new photographer had never shot at our venue. We also originally had 2 shooters but ended up with one. I originally had a let down feeling when I first saw our pictures because honestly they were a lot I didn’t love. Our original photographer is the one editing the images (we had no say in that) so it’s been frustrating figuring out who to talk to, as there are photos missing that we remember taking. I’m also not helping myself by scrolling through Instagram and seeing cute pictures/poses and wishing we had a photo like that. But I know I will never like my own picture as much as someone else’s.


    I didn’t get individual pictures of my and the groomsmen and I would have loved to have that. I don’t have a close up of my face with my eyes closed to see my makeup. I wish there was a picture of the back of my dress with the train all laid out nicely… and plenty of others.

    But at the end of the day the entire situation is out of my control. If we had spent the entire day getting every pose, I would have been burnt out and not enjoyed my wedding. And realistically I’m going to get a handful of my favorites printed to frame and not look at the rest too often. And the more I think about it, the more frustrated I get and I keep reminding myself I can’t change it now. It’s easy to get so focused on what we don’t like, that’s you forget all of the beautiful pictures you did get.
    I guess my point is, you aren’t alone. And when you expected to be in love with every picture you received and you aren’t, it’s a big let down.
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  • Emily
    Savvy August 2021
    Emily ·
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    Sarah, congratulations on your wedding!! I completely understand what you are feeling. I had a wonderful wedding and am so happy to marry my husband. I too don't care for my wedding pictures or my hair and make-up. However, what I am most upset about is that I didn't trust my gut when hiring these people. We had an engagement shoot 8 months before and the photographer took nice pictures but he didn't offer much direction and you could tell my husband wasn't very comfortable. I wanted to find someone else but this photographer came highly recommended was reasonable and I had paid my deposit. Our wedding photos of the ceremony and reception are fabulous. He caught the emotion of the day but our posed picture are straight out of 1994. Stick people like. Plus I was doing all the directing myself so I didn't include certain people. I was hoping for at least a couple of blow up worthy shots. My HMU girl got invited to a wedding later that day so she rushed through everyone and didn't do what my BM's wanted for there hair. Then proceeded to use my hotel bathroom for 30 minutes to get ready for said wedding. Which meant I didn't get the moment of dressing with my girls. I didn't love how I looked at my trial but again I immediately paid my deposit and didn't want to forfeit it. I figured if I brought my own eyeshadow it would be better. I looked ok but I've been married before and I felt stunning after that girl did my HMU. Our DJ royally screwed up our ceremony music and my girls walked down to silence, there was a huge gap once my song started because I couldn't hear if it was playing. Then we walked back down the aisle to silence because he forgot to play our recessional song. These are little things but I am type A and it wasn't hard. I regret not getting video of the ceremony or toasts. It was the most beautiful moment and NOT one guest videoed. My venue coordinator had an emergency which is so not anyone's fault but some details were not communicated to the staff. They served dinner late so we missed our sunset pictures. Again, little stuff but you work so hard and you want it to go smoothly. All in all I had so much fun but everytime I look at our pictures I'm filled with regret. Venting on here helps and I know nothing goes perfect. I just hope there is a little comfort in knowing you aren't alone. I received a few video clips from guests and it helped to see how much fun we were having. I suppose with time it will get better. I honestly thought about getting back into our wedding garb and redoing at least pictures of us but husband says that's ridiculous and to let it go. I'm sure with time we will.

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  • D
    Danielle ·
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    Hi Sarah,

    I'm 13 months on from my wedding and feeling exactly how you have described with the disappointment and sadness in my wedding photos!

    Our photographer did not take any bridal party robe shots when we were getting ready when I spent a fortune on personalised robes. I haven' even got any of just myself before the wedding!? It's all such a blur you don't think about it whilst you're prepping. I even wouldn't have gotten one with my mum if it wasn't for asking late in the day as it was on my mind that she didn't capture us in the morning!

    I loved my wedding dress but it was not captured in the way I thought it would be! Like you mentioned your shots were cropped as were mine and I honestly couldn't believe how many have been close ups when I wanted my gown to be shown off!?

    I am thinking of getting ready the same and having another bridal shoot to try and rectify bride and groom shots that I didn't get on the day. I feel ridiculous about doing it but so much time has passed and I still feel the same way Smiley sad

    We had a truly wonderful day but the photos are all you have to look back on and it hurts when you don't love them like you did the day.

    I hope you're feeling better about it now, truly understand how you're feeling.

    Best Wishes,

    Dani

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  • Al
    Al ·
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    I'm glad I am not alone.

    I waited for 8 months to get my wedding photos, and while I do think they capture our wedding perfectly I hate our portraits. Our photographer usually does multiple locations with couples, we got 1 location and a half location because there's very little photos all from a distance in B&W of another. Most of our portraits look kind of the same and that day I should have trusted my gut and demanded more but I decided to trust the professionals. There's only about 4 photos of me and don't think my dress, veil and bouquet were captured how they should have. I've been obsessing over it for months since it took almost a year to get them, my husband doesn't want to talk about the subject anymore because well, guess he doesn't get it. Just so upset that the best photos of my life, were kinda bleh.

    I'd love to do a re-do of maybe just me but don't know if that's ridiculous at this point.

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