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Rachel
Super June 2022

Guests no longer coming, feeling a little defeated :(

Rachel, on June 9, 2022 at 11:22 AM Posted in Planning 0 7
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Hi, Everyone -


Of course this happens to almost everyone in the final weeks leading up to their wedding, but I just had two guests (two people I was really excited about coming) message me to say that they won’t be able to make my wedding anymore due to travel circumstances (the short version of the story is it’s my cousin and his girlfriend, my cousin is from the UK and his girlfriend is from Hong Kong - the USA has recently changed their travel requirements and my cousin’s gf won’t be able to get a travel visa in time, it’s a big mess. Her Dad was also recently diagnosed with a serious illness and my cousin doesn’t want to travel alone and leave her behind while she’s also dealing with this). I’m obviously definitely understanding and appreciative that they took the time to explain why they suddenly won’t be able to make it, but now that will bring my overall guest count down to 44 (we thought we would have over 50 but people keep dropping ouf). I had always planned on having a small wedding and that was the goal, but it still is disappointing and it’s hard not to feel like I’m having such an awkward wedding since mostly family make up the guest list and we only have a few acquaintances and maybe just a couple close friends attending aside from that. I know that weddings and wedding days should be about the bride and groom and the reason is to celebrate our love at the end of the day, but how are you brides with small weddings coping when several guests cancel in the final weeks/days? I am still bummed…it will pass, but I’ve lost some of my excitement steam. 😞

7 Comments

Latest activity by Rosebud, on June 9, 2022 at 6:22 PM
  • Grace
    Super February 2022
    Grace ·
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    I was in the same boat with my wedding. Both of my sister's-in-law decided not to attend our wedding. One told us months in advance (her kids were too young to get vaccinated) but the other sister called us less than a week beforehand to tell us. It was hard but we made a point of video calling both of them after the reception was over.


    Our guest list was originally 80 and we were expecting 60 would RSVP yes. We ended up with 45. Once we were in the middle of it, we were so focused on who WAS there that the absences of those who WEREN'T there felt less. I hope that helps. ❤
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  • Rachel
    Super June 2022
    Rachel ·
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    Thank you so much, that does help a lot! I am trying to focus on the wedding itself and marrying my FH in our favorite place and I’m just glad we’ll have our immediate families there at the very least. I only have about 17 days left until my wedding so trying to stay positive! Thank you again ❤️❤️❤️
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  • Wheng
    Beginner February 2022
    Wheng ·
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    I am so sorry you’re dealing with this. I totally understand the way you’re feeling when you already planned a small wedding and guests are unable to make it to your and your future spouse’s big day. I got married last February and people were sending messages last minute about not coming after they had planned to attend. I think what helped me the weeks leading up to my wedding was mentally preparing for the possibility of people not showing up especially we were all dealing with COVID. My 79 year old MIL got COVID a week before our wedding. She was going to travel for our wedding. Thank goodness she didn’t get severely sick or hospitalized. But, we had to shift our mindset that her health is the priority. So, we told her that she will be missed. My husband and I definitely had to adjust our expectations. As we celebrated our big day, everything was perfect. Also, we just wanted to get married and get over with it because planning a wedding around a pandemic was very stressful. You can try to find the perfect timing where everyone can attend but something can always come up. Like you said, it will pass. What you’re feeling is totally normal. I’m sure your wedding day will be absolutely beautiful.

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  • Imani
    Master July 2022
    Imani ·
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    Sorry to hear about your cousins GF dad. I know when we get our hopes up about people attending and they drop out it makes us feel sad. I’m sure they would have loved to be there with you to celebrate. It can definitely be hard especially with everything that’s going on. I believe closer towards the big day your excitement will come back and your wedding day will be everything you’ve ever wanted.
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  • Allison
    Devoted May 2022
    Allison ·
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    We ended up having 13 people cancel (some the day of or the day before). It happens to everyone, so try not to get upset!

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  • Mrs.evans
    VIP October 2022
    Mrs.evans ·
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    I am fine with that because my FH wanted to elope and I had talk him out of it. So our guest is 65 but are ok with it so I'm sad that my son and daughter in law will be able to come because my son is in the army and he is in Russia dealing with that Ukraine war that is happening. So I heard word yet when he will be home. We are ok with a small amount of guests we didn't want a whole percussion of ppl to greet. It's ok enjoy your wedding day and the ppl who will be there to celebrate with you guys
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  • R
    Rockstar
    Rosebud ·
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    Awww that's sad they can't make it but hopefully you ll be able to see them soon. It s ok to feel your feelings but your day will be beautiful and special and hopefully everyone else will be able to make it. The most important thing is that at the end of that day you ll be married to your love Smiley smile Enjoy this special time and have the absolute best day!!

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