We are now 1.5 months from our big day. The registry has by far been the most stressful stressful part of planning because I'm not a gifts person. Fiancé and I have lived together for almost four years and have everything we need. I told my own friends to forget the gifts, just show up and enjoy themselves.
We made a registry with several dozen items, mostly small things (under $30) that would be nice to have but not essential. Whenever we think of something to add, we add it. However, my FMIL us telling us that people have been complaining behind our back -- saying we need to add more gifts, or that someone already bought the nice ones.
I told her that once the physical gifts run out, people still have the option of contributing to our honeymoon fund or charity in our honor. She replied that people will refuse to do that (including her, if she were a guest). It's possible some of our friends or younger relatives would, but it seems if we don't have a hundred pricey options on the registry, the boomers might just go off and buy some random thing rather than simply give a check. I guess that's the way things are done in his family. She won't drop the subject ever since we got engaged (when people pressured us to make an "engagement registry" and kept buying us stuff more than a year after the engagement).
I gave my fiancé access to the registry accounts and he agreed to handle all communication with relatives on this matter. However, I still have a feeling it will still fall on my shoulders because his mom will discuss it when I'm around. Also my shower is coming up, which I didn't want, but they guilted me into it. Now the shower host has bought a dozen items off the registry, leaving even less for the wedding guests.
Any advice for what to say to FMIL, or anyone else when this subject comes up again? A polite way to convey "Sorry you were too slow and missed the gifts. We will not be adding many more, but cash is still an option"?
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