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Mrs. Cohen
Super October 2018

Guestbook signing... after the wedding?

Mrs. Cohen, on October 22, 2018 at 4:04 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 29

We got married 1.5 weeks ago and upon returning from our honeymoon this past Saturday, we were SO EXCITED to go through our guestbook, but of the 47 guests that ended up attending, only about 20 actually signed the guestbook. This really bummed me out big time (it probably shouldn't, but it did). I think a big reason most didn't sign is because our day of coordinator didn't move the guestbook to the appropriate areas after the ceremony, so most guests didn't even see the guestbook Smiley sad


My mom suggested over the next few months since we'll see most of these guests throughout the holidays, to just bring our guestbook along with us and ask those who didn't get a chance to sign it to write something inside. Is that weird? Has anyone else done something like that? I don't want to feel like I'm pressuring people to sign our guestbook and also look weird hauling it around with us to all of the holiday festivities, but on the otherhand, I worked hard laying out our nice guestbook that utilized our engagement photos as well as spent a good chunk of change on it, so I hate to have so many blank pages in it. Thoughts?

29 Comments

Latest activity by Scarlett, on April 13, 2024 at 10:08 PM
  • FutureMrsKC
    Master January 2019
    FutureMrsKC ·
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    I totally understand wanting it signed but would also feel weird just pulling out after dinner like "So, you missed signing this a few weeks ago so I brought it so you could write well wishes to us now!"

    I would personally leave it be and be happy with what I do have because I would feel weird hauling it around but on the other hand since its not like 100 people I would be opposed to kjust asking people if they would. Idk.

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  • Sam
    Master August 2024
    Sam ·
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    Hi Future Mrs.C! I can totally understand your frustrations! I agree with FutureMrsKC in that it may be best to not chase down guests to sign your book! Instead, why not keep it as a guest book in your home to keep on your coffee table? While I know it does not hold the same sentimental value as being signed on your wedding day by your wedding guests, it can be used to collect new memories and fill the pages with words from your loved ones in your home! How do you feel about that idea?

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  • R
    Savvy September 2018
    RocknElegance ·
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    Similar thing happened to us but instead of a guest book we had vinyl records that we are planning to frame and hang - so it's even weirder! Only one of the 3 vinyl records looks full, the other 2 are slightly more bare... maybe we'll just hang the more-full one in the middle to balance it out lol. I don't think getting signatures after the fact is a good idea. I guess it is what it is and it's beautiful as it is. Even imperfections are beautiful in my eyes.

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  • Mrs. Cohen
    Super October 2018
    Mrs. Cohen ·
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    Yeah this is my dilemma lol I don't want to look weird hauling out guestbook around, but since it was mostly family and some of the wedding party that didn't get to sign, I also feel like maybe it wouldn't be weird. I just don't know...

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  • Sarah
    Master June 2016
    Sarah ·
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    Most of our wedding party didn’t sign our guest book and it was right next to their escort cards. I think it’s pretty common that some people just don’t sign the guestbook.
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  • Mrs. Cohen
    Super October 2018
    Mrs. Cohen ·
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    I don't know if I'd want just anyone signing our wedding guestbook as just a regular guestbook, but I suppose keeping it on our coffee table wouldn't be a bad idea. Maybe when the family & friends that were at the wedding visit us, it would be less awkward to be like, "hey, there was a lot going on during our wedding day, so if you didn't get a chance to sign our guestbook, we have it out if you wanna take the time to sign it, but if not that's cool too". Maybe that's better lol

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  • Jen
    VIP July 2018
    Jen ·
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    I definitely have experience here! So right after my wedding, I did compare our "guest book" technically a canvas wall hanging to our guest list and realized that of 185 people, there were 5 couples that didn't sign it. I thought it looked a bit more "sparse" than I expected but it was really because families signed it - so one signature could cover 4-5 people. That being said in the week or two after the ceremony, I did have my husband take it to work and he had 2 of his coworkers sign it..... so now we're missing just 3 couples. Three months have passed since then and I did see two of those couples last week but didn't bring it along to have them sign it..... with more time, I've sort of come to the conclusion that isn't really a big deal. If they are ever at my house I'd probably have them do it but I'm not going to bring it anywhere to get it done.

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  • Mcskipper
    Rockstar July 2018
    Mcskipper ·
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    I’m not a big guestbook signer and I would be SO a uncomfortable if someone tracked me down with their guestbook and made me sign it.

    guestbooks are nice for the memories but not everyone’s cup of tea, and certainly not an obligation. I’d just leave it.
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  • Mcskipper
    Rockstar July 2018
    Mcskipper ·
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    One thing that you could do instead would be to create a scrapbook of sorts. If your guest book is like a traditional book, you could fill the remaining pages with the cards that you were given, or transcribe messages from the cards into the book, so you still have their words and memories without chasing them down
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  • firstoneat56
    Master August 2017
    firstoneat56 ·
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    This is the reason I suggest that people forego a guest book. I never sign the guest book. You know I came and I already signed a card with a nice sentiment. Why do I need more work to do. Perhaps people just didn’t want to sign it and it would be totally awkward to ask them to sign it now.
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  • V
    Super April 2019
    Valerie ·
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    Honestly, I almost never sign guestbooks. There is usually a line when I see it and I'd rather go to the bar then wait in line to write an awkward 'So glad I came!' note.

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  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
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    Completely agree with this.

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  • Mrs. Cohen
    Super October 2018
    Mrs. Cohen ·
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    Yeah this is my concern with my mom's suggestion of bringing the guestbook around. I know most of our family/friends that didn't sign it would be totally cool with doing so after the fact, but I also know there are probably a few that maybe didn't sign it on purpose because it's just not something they want to do. I also get that bringing it to people and basically "forcing" them to sign it could make it a really uncomfortable situation... I think I'm leaning more towards the let it be and just never open the guestbook to be saddened by how blank it is option LOL

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  • Mrs. Cohen
    Super October 2018
    Mrs. Cohen ·
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    This is definitely a unique idea... or to even just paste the cards onto the empty pages, because let's be honest, where else will we store all of those cards? lol Thanks for a good idea!

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  • M
    Expert September 2018
    M ·
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    Don't track down people. If they wanted to sign it they would have sought it out. That would be weird pressure to lug it around and stand over someone as they write, "congratulations."
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  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
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    I think it would be strange to get signatures after the fact. Put in special cards that were not just signed, but had a message too, whether those sent with gifts, or received at the wedding. No one will ever look but you. Also, enclose a guest list of who actually came. Over time you forget some. I am one who will stand 1 foot from a guestbook 12 times in a night and never sign it unless a really annoying person is getting signatures, and signing makes them go away. Or I will sign happily for a child. Not really your coordinator's fault. Some brides have them taken table to table and passed around, and still half of the people do not sign. We got about 40 signatures of 160 plus. Only had one because it was a shower gift. They are like year books. Some people get every picture signed. Me, I locked mine in a locker till I took it home. I did not want inky messages messing up the pages. So accept, some people just don't sign, and do not want to.
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  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
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    One sister is a cross every t and dot every i personality, and could not stand that about 10% did not sign. She quit trying about the third time (after the wedding, Sunday brunch) when someone would push back the book and say, what, I'm so forgettable, you won't remember I was here? Like that was insulting. But Saskia just wanted every single signature, that is her perfectionist streak.
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  • Saraí
    April 2019
    Saraí ·
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    I love this idea!!!!!!

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  • V
    Super April 2019
    Valerie ·
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    Not sure how not wanting to sign what is essentially a high school yearbook for a wedding makes me not treat my friends special. I give a nice card with a message that I have time to think of and write and a very generous gift. I don't feel obligated to sign the 'Tree of Hope' or whatever BS is the new trend in guest books.

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  • Saraí
    April 2019
    Saraí ·
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    When you go to a wedding you agree to be part of it and make them feel special in any type of way. Gifts are nice but are not everything, that's where people fail. Thinking money solves everything when is the little details LIKE SIGNING THE BOOK what counts. Unfortunately it sounds like 'generous' gifts Is what's more important to you.

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