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Rosie
Master February 2022

First Dance tips - in a ballgown!

Rosie, on January 31, 2022 at 8:57 PM Posted in Wedding Reception 0 12

I've asked this before elsewhere and people seemed to think it was a silly question, but I'm a bit apprehensive about our first dance so I'm going to ask here too, now that the day is drawing closer!

I am the kind of person who likes to practise, likes to be secure, likes to know how things will go so I feel confident. And... I can't tell my husband-to-be about my absolutely huge ballgown of a dress, nor can we practise dancing in it in advance!

My fiance and I have quite a height difference (about 45cm or almost 18 inches) so we did decide to go to a few private dance classes with a professional for our wedding, and we've kept it a secret so the bar remains as low as possible, with no one really expecting anything more than your standard sway and shuffle.

I did ask the teacher, but he's a man, and I don't know if he really.. quite grasped the sheer size of my dress, and he didn't have many helpful tips on how to navigate our routine with either a train or a hoop skirt (although my dress will be bustled, and I'm not yet sure if the full hoop will fit under my skirt - I won't know until my last fitting next week, after our final dance class).

So, those of you who wore a ballgown, what is your advice, please? I'm expecting if I can fit the hoop under my skirt, that I will have to take it out for the first dance, but other than that is there anything I should know? Be aware of? Tips I can give to my fiance so he doesn't step on things?

My one thought, is that during our private couple photos, we go look at the reception whilst our guests are out having cocktail hour (which we'd planned to do anyway) and maybe see if we can sneak in a little practise? Any other ideas?

12 Comments

Latest activity by Rosie, on February 6, 2022 at 5:56 PM
  • L
    Super August 2023
    Lunajay ·
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    I have not danced in a full ballgown dress before, but I have seen your dress (on your pictures) and I don't think you'll have an issue. Will your dress be fuller then on the picture you posted? Is there someone you a do a little dance and turn at you last fitting?

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  • Hanna
    VIP June 2019
    Hanna ·
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    I wore a ballgown and we had a choreographed first dance. We practiced during the cocktail hour, which was my first time practicing in the dress. It was super helpful to have those few minutes to "rehearse." I also had my dress bustled which helped. I think your idea of sneaking in a little practicing before the first dance is excellent. This is exactly what worked for us!

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  • Rosie
    Master February 2022
    Rosie ·
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    Oh that's a great idea! My SIL will be there, and I'll be taking the dress home, so maybe I can put it on and invite a friend over to try it out!

    It will be bigger than that picture, yes. I want it to be closer to the size it was when I bought it:

    First Dance tips - in a ballgown! 1


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  • Rosie
    Master February 2022
    Rosie ·
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    Oh, phew, I'm glad to hear from someone who did it that our little plan works! did your husband struggle at all with the size of your dress? I suppose women used to dance all the time in dresses like that so I shouldn't be so anxious, plus I imagine by the time the first dance actually rolls around, he'd have had quite some time to get used to the dress!

    I guess I am definitely the type that needs to practise things to feel fully prepared!

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  • Hanna
    VIP June 2019
    Hanna ·
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    While it wasn't as easy as when we practiced before in normal clothes, I don't think my husband struggled with the size. My dress didn't have a hoop but had a few layers of crinoline and was about the same size as yours in the photo. We probably spent 10 minutes during cocktail hour practicing our dance and that was enough to do the trick. I think you'll be fine!

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  • Rosie
    Master February 2022
    Rosie ·
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    tenor.gif


    thank you - that's really comforting!
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  • J
    Super March 2022
    JA ·
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    I 100000% recommend keeping your hoop in when you dance. It is so much easier to dance with a hoop than not. I have danced literally hundreds of times in ballgowns and I would never do it without a hoopskirt. Your dress should be tailored so the bottom of the dress is about 1-1.5cm off the floor (the standard for ballgowns) and this ensure you and FH wont trip on it. I totally agree with going through the dance during cocktail hour! Also, you can practice in a hoop skirt (with no dress/skirt over it) to give you and FH an idea of what it will be like.

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  • Rosie
    Master February 2022
    Rosie ·
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    I think I agree that the hoop might actually help, exceeeeept...

    The only thing I have a concern about is the lift in the hoop - this is probably the best pic I could find of the type of lift we are doing -

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    I think if he were to lift too close some of the hoops, the likelihood is that the skirt would flip up. I think it would also be hard to find and grab my leg to lift if I were wearing the hoop!

    Also just to clarify... I bought the hoop online and it didn't arrive until after my last fitting. It is absolutely HUGE and my concern is that the dress will be too short when I try it on at the next fitting, but I won't get to try it on with the dress until after our last dance class - so I won't know if I'm able to wear it until quite late.

    Plus, because I want to keep the surprise over what silhouette my dress is intact, I'd prefer not to wear the hoop to practise in, as it would immediately give that away.

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  • V
    Beginner September 2021
    Vanessa ·
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    I practiced in a crinoline hoop at home with my husband before the wedding, and with my ballgown/hoop once with my MOH. The dress skirts were heavy and got very tangled in my legs without the hoop so I wore it for my first dance. Hubby and I also sneaked in practice day of right before we were introduced for our first dance
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  • Rosie
    Master February 2022
    Rosie ·
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    I will have to see if this is the case for me - it will have fairly voluminous petticoats either way, but the crinoline really does keep the fabric right off your legs. I did drag it out and tested how I thought I might go, and I think it would look really nice with the bigger hoop, I just think the lift is likely to be an issue. I'll just have to see how I go at my fitting and decide from there, I guess!

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  • B
    VIP July 2017
    Becky ·
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    Do you have a friend who could lift you like in your dance while you have the hoop on? That may give you a better idea of whether you're all of a sudden going to be showing your scanties to all your guests.

    PPs are right, though - your dress should be hemmed short enough for you not to step on it, so it shouldn't be a problem for him when you dance.

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  • Rosie
    Master February 2022
    Rosie ·
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    Fingers crossed! And ugh, I don't know anyone strong enough to lift this lump, lol! But if I did that would be a great idea! I will know better on thursday at my fitting if I'll even wear the hoop, so I think I will just wait and see how I go after that, and make sure fiance and I sneak off for a 5 min practise before hand, haha!

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