Feeling a little excluded as a bridesmaid - am i being silly?

You said it yourself that you are mostly as friends when hanging out as couples together. The dress shopping normally is a really small group that would be most consistent with her taste. Too many people at the dress appointments can just add confusion. It seems best just to focus on a positive attitude since she has not even done anything to push you aside. Like you said... just focus on helping to make the event as happy for her as you can by your contributions.

Your friendship then may blossom over time. You might also seek ways to add friends. Maybe doing some exercise classes or other hobbies with others. Find shared activities with her or invite her to take a class with you. Those sort of ideas.

Honestly, only my mom and I went dress shopping, out of the blue too- we just saw a bridal shop and thought hey let's just see! My best friend, who's getting married in 8 months, also only took her mom and sister. I think it's really quite normal! A lot of people make the dress shopping out to be this big deal. I know my sister-in-law also just took her mom. I wouldn't look at it that she's adding you out of pity! Please don't think like that- try to give her the benefit of the doubt, and see yourself as an important part in her life, as she was/is to yours. We create our own realities in our heads, for better or worse, and sometimes we need to be reminded of what's actually happening than what we are assuming the other people are feeling. Don't fret!! I'm saying this because I can absolutely get the same way about things- but truly, we're our harshest critics. I'm sure she's not thinking of you like that!

I would assume good intent on her part, and a genuine friendship there. Don't let your brain feed you a false narrative on her motivations.

Dress shopping can be a very vulnerable experience, and she probably didn't want too many people there. Why not ask her out for lunch or drinks and a catch up? Ask her about the dress and her shopping experience.

Dress shopping can be a very personal experience. In my social circle, including bridesmaids for dress shopping is simply not a thing. I've been a bridesmaid 8 times and not once was I asked to accompany the bride while dress shopping. In addition, I did not include any of my wedding party when I went dress shopping, just my mom.

Unless this person invited every other bridesmaid except you to go dress shopping, then I wouldn't think anything of it.

I think it is the unusual bride who shares so much everyday experiences with her bridesmaids that they would all be there for trying on dresses. Sometimes we can think that is the norm. This is also when we maybe see movies with fancy bachelorette parties with everyone going wild. Again, this is the exception and only few people can do these.

Like mentioned so many times. The bridesmaid duty is to get her dress and be there alongside the bride at the wedding ceremony. This works both ways -- what the bride should require from a bridesmaid and what a bridesmaid should expect her involvement in pre-events with the bride. Of course, usually there is more shared activity than just the wedding, but not always the same degree among all wedding parties.

I would presume she has the best of intentions and that they are truly pals. Do not let a false story about her motivations be fed to you by your brain.

I love all my BM's a lot but didn't take any of the dress shopping.

I probably would have invited more people to go dress shopping with me, but I had scheduled an appointment at a bridal shop in my hometown "just to look," I only brought my mom, and I ended up finding The Dress. Sometimes things just happen that way. I wouldn't look at this as anything worth worrying over.

A lot of places now have guest limits because of Covid. It could have just been that she had too many people she wanted to bring and not enough spots. I had to have some bridesmaids sit out because I just didn't have the space to bring them dress shopping.