Hi everyone! I'm here to vent/get advice about my upcoming wedding. I am at such a loss with what to do, as I know so many other brides this year have been due to Covid-19. It's really hitting me hard lately and I just don't know what to do. I'm supposed to get married 11/1/2020 in CT - my fiance and I have been holding out hoping that restrictions would be lifted more by then. Our current guest list is 100 people (including vendors) but we can easily get it down to 40. We learned this week that CT's phase 3 of reopening has been indefinitely postponed. That would have allowed us to have 50 guests indoors, but as is we are stuck in phase 2 which is limited to 25 people indoors. Apparently that number has to include staff, vendors and guests. And we would not be able to have a dance floor, bar, masks would be mandatory, etc. Plus we worry about the safety of our guests. Our venue has been closed and was hoping to reopen in August with phase 3 but now all of that is up in the air. We had a payment due last month that they were willing to postpone until August 1st - ultimately we are trying to make a decision about the wedding with that deadline in mind because the payment is $2,000 which is non-refundable.
We are so heartbroken because we found our dream venue, photographer, videographer, DJ, florist, etc. and we already put down deposits on everything. It's essentially all booked and ready to go, with final payments due the week before the wedding. If we decide to outright cancel everything right now we will lose about $6-7,000. However, we would have about $10k leftover if we cancel (the money was gifted to us to use however we wanted - wedding, to help with a house, etc.) so it's not like we would be completely broke over this. It's just a lot of money to lose. We are determined to get married this year and are trying to weigh the pros and cons of just eloping, having a small ceremony (parents + bridal party), or postponing the reception until next year. My fiance and I are just so anxious over all this and don't know what the right call is.
1.) If we elope we will still have our photographer present and have our best man and matron of honor as witnesses most likely. This option is nice because it gives us full control and there's less people to worry about...most people have given their blessing on this.
2.) A small ceremony would include our photographer, parents, and bridal party (so about 12 people total). We would keep it small and maybe go out to dinner afterwards.
3.) We could do either of the options above and still postpone the main reception until next year, or or just cancel altogether. Postponing would mean we should be able to keep our deposits intact - I have to check with the venue how that would work or if there's even any dates left.
4.) We can hold out and see what happens!
A little more info: there's been a lot of drama surrounding our wedding since we got engaged. My mom has caused a lot of issues and doesn't like my future mother-in-law, so as of right now they have TWO bridal showers planned which is a whole other mess I've been dealing with. One of the reasons cancelling everything is appealing is because we would also cancel the showers and there would be no more wedding drama, haha. I've been low key worried about our wedding day in that aspect. Also, who's to say that postponing our reception to a date next year will be any better with Covid-19? We just don't know yet and it's super frustrating. At the same time we have worked so hard to create the wedding of our dreams and I worry that by cancelling we might regret it.
Any CT or New England brides still getting married this fall? Are most of you postponing? I would love to hear from you!
