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Bianca
Beginner September 2020

Covid 19 September Wedding - Massachusetts

Bianca, on July 10, 2020 at 1:17 PM Posted in Massachusetts Planning 1 18

Hello everyone!

I am sure most of you are extremely stressed out as I have been either if you have had to cancel, postpone, or kill off some dreams of your 'big day'. I am praying for all of us.

Is anyone else in here a Massachusetts bride? My wedding falls under PHASE 3 here and we are unsure if we should chug along or postpone. Right now they're saying NO DANCE FLOORS, NO BAR SERVICE (waiters or waitresses only), MASKS REQUIRED at all times unless seated, 6 TO A TABLE, NO PHOTOBOOTHS (I REALLY wanted a photo booth) and we are completely unsure of how many people we will be able to have in our inclosed/unenclosed tent.

Is a wedding a fun wedding with no dancing? My vendor says we can't even wiggle, it's full-on footloose status... And everyone will be required to wear a mask in Septemeber which can be really REALLY hot.

They told me I don't have to wear a mask walking down the aisle, for pictures, and I can have a small dance floor very tiny for a father/daughter and first dance.

I am so unsure of what to do. I am an emotional wreck. I really don't want to postpone because we had horrible for new date options for next year. We had to choose a Friday... August 13th (cursed date - we were considering hiring someone to wear a Jason mask if we have to switch...) at the same time which would be 3:30pm meaning everyone would have to take a day off of work.

Is it even worth it to have a DJ? Are guests going to be extremely uncomfortable in a mask? We've put in so much money I am not even sure what to do. Are you accepting that you are going to have guests being taken pictures of with masks on for your wedding album?

We aren't even being offered a discount so we're paying close to 25k for a wedding and are getting ripped off because I can't have a 'normal' wedding but yet I am feeling as if someone has died having to think about postponing.

Please share any stories, advice, or concerns for your own wedding I am hoping to gain some insight from other brides.

All my love and prayers,

Bianca

18 Comments

Latest activity by Katie, on November 16, 2020 at 9:26 PM
  • B
    Just Said Yes March 2020
    Brianna ·
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    I feel you! We were supposed to get married May 9th. Switched it to Sept 25th. Then phase 3 came out and when we were reading about maybe not even being able to have our first dance I went into full meltdown mode. We actually just decided to switch to a venue in N.H. right over the border. Still restrictions but not as bad as MA. If worse came to worse we would’ve stuck it out and had it in MA but thankfully we found a Saturday date the week before at this new venue. It’s so difficult, but you could be very creative on things to do other than dancing. Like cornhole tournaments, board games at tables, etc. maybe things will change as your date gets closer. Best of luck and just try to remember that everything WILL be ok
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  • Bianca
    Beginner September 2020
    Bianca ·
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    Happy for you Smiley heart My vendor isn't offering refunds or discounts so we have to stick with them which I am kind of annoyed about because I would have done something similar. What are your restrictions for NH? I am just curious what people are dealing with vs. deal breakers. My deal breaker was wearing a mask down the aisle and for pictures, and not being able to have a first dance but they told me I can. So its like so many pros and cons its so tough to decide. Thank you Smiley heart Everything will be okay its so tough just being like 'IDK' with my hands up when people ask me about the wedding plans haha!

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  • Jennifer
    Dedicated July 2021
    Jennifer ·
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    I was a Mass September bride, but we decided ultimately to postpone to next year. We couldn't imagine having to social distance at our wedding, not being able to hug anyone in thanks for coming, no dancing... just thinking about it really brought me down. As cute as it sounded to have custom masks as favors, it's just not how we envisioned our wedding day.

    Would it be possible to still get married on your original date, with a small intimate ceremony, and then have the reception and celebration next year? That way your wedding date won't be the cursed date, but you'll still be able to have the party with everyone without distancing and masks.

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  • B
    Just Said Yes March 2020
    Brianna ·
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    So in N.H. you can have 165 people indoors. Masks aren’t required but we are going to ask that people wear them when they are walking around to bathrooms, etc. The dance floor can be open with 50% capacity which I feel like is pretty normal with every wedding I’ve been at with everyone taking breaks, getting drinks or whatever. Our deal breaker was the fact that we could only have 25 people right now and I was just too nervous that the number wasn’t going to go up by much by September. 25 is impossible for us. I know we won’t have a “normal” wedding but the dance floor and having a bar (our families can DRINK) are what had us change. I cannot believe venues are cooperating with money especially during this time, I’m so sorry!
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  • Jessica
    Master September 2020
    Jessica ·
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    I understand the stress and anxiety totally! I’m sorry that we are all having to make these decisions! I have not totally embraced the idea of masks, but they are required where we’re getting married unless you are seated, so I just have to get over it. Where our ceremony is no one will be required to wear masks because it’s outside with plenty of room to spread out at a park.
    We have already been engaged 17 months (two more to go!) and really don’t want to push it out another year. At this point we’ve just embraced the restrictions. We were planning a small sunrise wedding and breakfast reception anyways, so we really only planned to do a short first dance, cake, and then invite anyone who wants to join us to enjoy the town (we’re getting married in the mountains in CO).If we had to postpone, we decided we would keep our date and get married just us and the photographer this year, and have a vow renewal and reception next year close to our anniversary. We got the blessing of family, even though they want to be there they would have understood. It’s an option maybe, that way 8/13 isn’t your official date, just the day your reaffirming and celebrating. Take back the 13th!
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  • Bianca
    Beginner September 2020
    Bianca ·
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    Same, its definitely bringing me down because this is supposed to be a huge milestone. People have brought up the idea of having a small ceremony and then having the reception next year but I am feeling in my heart that it would take away from the actual wedding next year? Its the mind games of going back and forth that is really breaking me. When did you postpone until? My only concern is 'what if next year isn't any different' since Charlie Baker said phase 4 won't come until we have a vaccination or treatment and even though there are speculations that a shot will come out in the winter, its not 100%. Thank you for reaching out, I really appreciate it.

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  • Bianca
    Beginner September 2020
    Bianca ·
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    I am still waiting for the health board to tell us how many people we can invite because it is an outdoor wedding but our tent has flaps so it's going to either be 50 people or 100 people if they deem it unenclosed (that's a huge difference since we invited 140 people lol!). I have to wait a few more days to find out according to my vendor which is obviously driving me nuts lol! Thank you for letting me know, this has definitely given me something to think about Smiley heart

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  • Bianca
    Beginner September 2020
    Bianca ·
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    We are having a tented outdoor wedding so that's where my lines are blurred too because my ceremony and cocktail hour are completely open outside but my tent they may consider an indoor area. The vendor is saying masks required at all times besides being seated but what we did outdoor games since we can't have a dance floor? I'll have to clarify there. We've been engaged for almost a year now as well and that's why we don't want to push it back either, my eggs aren't getting any younger lol!!!! Thanks for your strength, it has given me some comfort and hope Smiley heart

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  • Jennifer
    Dedicated July 2021
    Jennifer ·
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    I completely understand that, that's why we ended up moving the whole thing instead of keeping the original date as just a small wedding. We moved it to July 31, 2021, which ended up being a more meaningful date to us than our original 9/20/20, since we will have been together 7 year, 7 months, and 7 days on that date and we got engaged at a casino so it fit really well.

    That concern is still there for us too, I try not to think about it but it's always there in the back of mind, "what if nothing has changed by next summer?". We decided that if this is still happening we're getting married no matter what and doing the small intimate ceremony in July. My fingers are crossed so hard for a vaccine this winter.

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  • Jessica
    Master September 2020
    Jessica ·
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    That is kind of a grey area. I would think with most outdoor games you can maintain social distancing, but would there be an issue because multiple people are touching them?
    Sometimes I wish I we had just decided to rush planning and get married last September, but when we got engaged we could have never imagined a global pandemic messing with all our plans!
    I wish I could say I was hopeful things will be better in September, but the way things are going around us and in many states I’m even more anxious than I was a month ago trying to decide if we send out invites or postpone. Our cases are on an upward trend again after being on a downward trend for weeks and I can’t help worrying. Hoping for the best for all of us 2020 brides!
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  • D
    June 2021
    Dj Tanner ·
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    Do you know if they will let you postpone? Have you already put in too much money? Rhode Island has been A LOT more relaxed on the rules for outdoor weddings. however things are changing by the week so who knows what they will decide next week kind of thing. I personally don’t think it’s worth having a reception at that point because one of the main reasons of having a wedding is so that way everyone can dance and have a good time. Feeling restricted, having to wear a mask in 80° weather, and no bar just seems like no fun and too many rules. If it’s possible for you financially I would definitely suggest holding off on your big reception until next year because to me I think these venues are seriously ripping everyone off, And they truly aren’t holding up to their end of the deal or their contract at all as much as they say they are. They can’t provide you with any of the services that you initially thought you were going to have so they should at least have the common decency to give you back a large some of your money. None of these rules and restrictions were ever discussed prior to you signing your contract so the fact that venues automatically think that they are in the right is outrageous.
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  • Bianca
    Beginner September 2020
    Bianca ·
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    Bless all of us Smiley heart It is tough to say but right now they're saying outdoor games are acceptable. So at least there is that I'm just praying that the weather holds up. I hope you have the most beautiful day for your wedding - the mountains in CO are going to be fantastic Smiley heart

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  • Bianca
    Beginner September 2020
    Bianca ·
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    They'll let us postpone but we only have the options of Friday or Sundays without a Monday holiday. I was going to get married on a Sunday with labor day being the day after. So with that said, we chose a Friday backup date but now people would definitely have to take off work for it. Another thing I am afraid of too is who to say they won't go out of business by then or perhaps jack up prices next year due to loss in money this year. They have already said they won't refund us (we already put 16k in deposits ) so we only have the ability to postpone. I agree they should be refunding at least some money... its disgusting but at the end of the day business is business I guess and some of these places don't care.

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  • D
    June 2021
    Dj Tanner ·
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    Once you make your decision and it’s all said and done I would seriously blast them out so badly on social media. I would go on to every sort of yelp and trip adviser and everything you can possibly imagine probably even the new station to ream them out publicly so everyone knows just how much these people could care not less about someone’s wedding day.
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  • A
    Beginner May 2022
    Angela ·
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    Hi,
    I am in MA as well and I rescheduled my September wedding to next year. Ultimately, too many of my guests were uncomfortable attending a large event and I was concerned about our ability to host an event safely, even with all of the precautions. I’m not sure if 2021 will really be better, but that’s the best we can do right now.
    Take care and best of luck with your wedding.
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  • Chrissy
    Just Said Yes August 2020
    Chrissy ·
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    I'm in MA too with an August wedding date. We decided a month ago to cancel our 100 person indoor/outdoor wedding. Our venue thankfully agreed to reimburse 90% of what we had already paid. Instead we are planning an intimate, family only backyard ceremony on the same date with a live stream for guests who will no longer be there in person. It was a punch in the gut to have to un-invite all our friends, but given the circumstances everyone has been super understanding and supportive. Good luck with your wedding planning!

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  • Julie
    Just Said Yes July 2021
    Julie ·
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    I’m creeping on this post because I’m new here and absorbing all the information and advice I can get! What is your NH venue? I’m looking into venues right now (just got engaged) and my main thing is being sure I have a venue that’ll work with me if by next year things aren’t better!
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  • Katie
    Beginner September 2021
    Katie ·
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    I would honestly postpone it because you want everything for the price your paying. As it may be stressful still to postpone, you also don’t want to regret any choices for your wedding which is also why some brides are having two types of celebrations because of covid. Do with what would make you happy only. Also, think of the prices your paying for the time, like do you need a DJ if you can’t really have guests dancing? Would your wedding be less than 6 hours or more with limited things happening?
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