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Carrie7
Just Said Yes October 2022

Bridal shower…without family?

Carrie7, on June 20, 2022 at 8:36 PM Posted in Parties and Events 0 9
I’m not gonna lie, I’ve been feeling pretty lonely lately while planning our wedding. I moved out to be with my fiancé and on his family’s small dairy farm. I’ve made some friends but I can’t say I’m super close to any of them. I’ve only been out here a year. I can’t decide if I want a bridal shower or not. I mean I do! But… my family is across the country including my MOH… one of my BM hasn’t been to responsive to me lately /shrug/ and all of my childhood friends are over 3 hrs away back in my home town. I can’t help feel like having a bridal shower without MY main people isn’t what I want. I don’t love focus of attention let alone surrounded by people that I’m not sure really would want to be there. Also do you keep the shower guest list to those invited to the wedding? (In case I decide to do it) I can’t help but feel like I would just be choosing to put stress on someone to have to go through with planning it.
Sorry for the long read

9 Comments

Latest activity by AlexandroDavies, on May 11, 2023 at 6:50 AM
  • Imani
    Master July 2022
    Imani ·
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    Has your MOH or BM mentioned the bridal shower? I understand how you feel about not wanting to do it without your main people, but if the people you’ve got close to over the year would celebrate with you that doesn’t sound like a bad idea. Also, 3 hours isn’t that far to drive back if you did decide to have it back home with your childhood friends.
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  • Carrie7
    Just Said Yes October 2022
    Carrie7 ·
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    A BM offered to plan it if I wanted one. I guess I’m uncomfortable asking for someone to do something for me on that scale. But good point
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  • Erin
    Super May 2022
    Erin ·
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    You’re not alone! I’ve seen many out-of-town brides feel this way. I second Imani. If there’s people you have become close with that are near you, it will be a fun and rewarding experience for you. I was kind of sad leading up to my own bridal shower because we had people cancelling left and right and it got down to only 12 people. But those that showed provided so much love and enthusiasm 🥰
    If you do decide to do it, yes it would need to be people who are also invited to the wedding. Inviting someone to the shower, but not the wedding is seen as trying to get a gift out of someone, but you’re not willing to pay to have them at your wedding.
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  • Kelly
    Rockstar October 2023
    Kelly ·
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    Maybe you could have your bridal shower back where your family is. It would require you to travel, but your people would be there. Only guests invited to the wedding should be invited to pre wedding activities.

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  • Carrie7
    Just Said Yes October 2022
    Carrie7 ·
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    Thank you for the idea, but with the costs of flights, I can’t swing it :/
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  • Ashlee
    Super September 2022
    Ashlee ·
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    My MIL threw one with FH's family and some of our friends here. My step mom and mom are throwing me a "bridal brunch" in my home state, and put that gifts are optional (please have shipped directly to ADDRESS if choosing to purchase gift) on the invite. That way I get to celebrate with both sides, even though they can't all physically be at the same shower at once.

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  • Carrie7
    Just Said Yes October 2022
    Carrie7 ·
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    Thank you. I appreciate everyone's support.. I need to remember it's just as much for others as it is for me. Especially for FH's family and friends here to have a chance to get to know me better too

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  • R
    Rockstar
    Rosebud ·
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    I m sorry you feel a little lonely, during life's happiest moments it can be really hard to be away from your loved ones. You want to share all your joys with the most important people, I hope you can enjoy these sweet moments and feel their love from afar. This might sound silly but during covid I attended quite a few virtual zoom showers. Maybe you can do one of those for your side. It s not exactly the same but you can still feel their love and share some laughs with your people. if they wanted they could send you gifts to open during it. Surprisingly enough even the older generations seemed to have fun once they got the hang of it. Good luck to you!

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  • Carrie7
    Just Said Yes October 2022
    Carrie7 ·
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    I can't believe I forgot about the whole zoom option! Great idea!!

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