Black Tie — Dinner place setting Question

Black tie weddings are the premium in etiquette expectations. Among the required items at this level is live bands for the ceremony/cocktail hour/reception, valet service, white glove food service, premium liquor, table side ordering for dinner, coat check, reception after 6 pm, among other items. So for sure the dinner place settings should be at that level.

I think you should have the butter knife on the bread plate, and the used forks will be cleared between courses, so one fork for each course.

You'll need a spoon for coffee service as well. It's placed at 12 o'clock position above the plate with the dessert fork. In most cases there also should be a teaspoon to the right of the knives. So really for a formal place setting you need two spoons.

Oh, I see. Usually the cake is kind of an extra to the dessert offering for black tie.

That should be OK then.

You asked for the etiquette, I'm just providing the best answers I can. If you're skipping dessert, then just use a teaspoon. You don't need a dessert spoon then.

Black tie doesn't require two desserts, though you'll often see multiple options. Proper table service does require a utensil for each course with nothing reused. As far as being "very full" with this menu, I'm not sure what it has to do with the question at hand other than to justify fewer implements ie just the one dessert. Not everyone stuffs themselves at cocktail hour. I've been to weddings that had stations that lined the perimeter of large rooms. The utensils come down to proper table service and the menu, not the quantity of food.

I apologize that it came across that way. I did follow the conversation and specifically said other than the need for another dessert I didn't necessarily see the connection to the amount of food at cocktail hour because it's strictly about the number of courses at dinner but that as an aside not everyone eats a ton during cocktail hour. If you notice, though, I also said cake is a perfectly acceptable stand alone dessert.

Yes, to the additional pieces. All the tines . . . A full place setting will also signal to the guest they can skip that awkward guest/server conversation: "do I keep my fork/ no, I take that fork". This will surely be a treat for some guests as there are many ways to dine in NY. I've never had a pasta course. What did you choose?