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Savvy June 2021

Bar Situation

Taylor, on March 8, 2021 at 9:36 PM Posted in Wedding Reception 0 23

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Cannot figure out what we want to do about the bar situation. We anticipate having about 200 people at our wedding. The groom's family is from small, midwestern towns where cash bar is typical. My (bride's) family is from Chicagoland area and used to a bit more lavish weddings where open bar all night is standard.

Our venue does not do any type of drink package per person, they just charge per drink. The drinks really arent terribly priced. $4/beer, $5-6/mixed drink, $7-8 for fancier drinks. However, I'm worried that if we just do open bar, all of the people used to a cash bar will think I have a rich relative and go crazy, racking up the bill 😂 I should also note that we will be paying for the bar bill on our own.
Any ideas on how to cater to both sides of the family, finding a happy-medium without looking cheap or tacky?

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23 Comments

Latest activity by Michelle, on March 9, 2021 at 6:50 PM

Rockstar July 2019
Veronica · on March 8, 2021 at 9:47 PM
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Unfortunately, there is no nice way to ask guests to pay for anything at your wedding even if some of your guests are used to this.
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Rockstar December 2022
Michelle · on March 8, 2021 at 9:55 PM
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Do not ask guests to pay for their own drinks. Serve what you can afford, don't offer what you can't.
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Super September 2020
Alli · on March 8, 2021 at 9:58 PM
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I agree with above... I would only provide beer, wine, and 1 mixed drink then.
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Expert September 2020
Amanda · on March 8, 2021 at 10:08 PM
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I agree with others to limit the drink options but keep an open bar.
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VIP August 2020
Katie · on March 8, 2021 at 10:12 PM
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Hi Taylor, a happy medium I think is offering beer and wine with two mixed. Unless you have your heart set on one of the fancier drinks, I would skip those. For ours we had several beer options (Bud Light, Miller Light, IPA, YingLing) a white wine (Moscato) a red wine (Cabernet), Manhattan and Gin and Tonic. White Claw was the most popular drink of the night 🥃🍻🍷
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Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on March 8, 2021 at 10:52 PM
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I don’t really know why there would need to be a happy medium, no one who is used to cash bars at weddings is going to be disappointed that you have an open bar. It’s your event and your responsibility to pay, guests shouldn’t have to open their wallets at your wedding.
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Master April 2021
Michelle · on March 8, 2021 at 11:33 PM
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We just bought our alcohol from Sam’s Club. We went through our guest list & figured who drinks beer & spirits. Googled & used the alcohol calculator to figure out how much to buy. Once it’s gone, it’s gone.
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Dedicated May 2019
Kylie · on March 9, 2021 at 8:23 AM
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Do the consumption bar and everyone will be happy. Do you seriously think so little of your new family that they'd get trashed just because it's not on their dime? If someone is intent to drink a lot at a wedding, they will, whether they have to pay for it or not. I really can't imagine anyone drinking outrageously more just because they don't have to pay.
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Master October 2019
Meghan · on March 9, 2021 at 8:37 AM
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I would do an open beer and wine bar. This will prevent your guests from having to pay for their own drinks while saving you and your fiancé money.
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Super June 2021
Elizabeth · on March 9, 2021 at 9:11 AM
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You can limit to beer and wine to cut costs and be able to have a more reasonable estimate. Your venue should be able to help you come up with projected costs for the bar, even if you are paying by drink.

I'm also a proponent of trimming the guest list to be able to properly host your guests, if need be.
Definitely never have a cash bar
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Dedicated September 2021
Elizabeth · on March 9, 2021 at 10:27 AM
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My fiancé and I have a similar situation, so our venue recommended drink tickets. So we pay for each guest to have one beer or wine on us and then cash bar for the rest. The tickets look a little tacky, but we are trying to come up with some other alternative to paper tickets
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Expert March 2021
Marcia · on March 9, 2021 at 11:04 AM
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From a guest perspective, I really don't recommend this route. It's still a cash bar.
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Expert November 2021
Sara · on March 9, 2021 at 12:10 PM
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Totally agree. Drink tickets at a wedding are super tacky.
OP, if it's cost you're worried about, then just do an open bar with beer & wine only.
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Savvy June 2021
Taylor · on March 9, 2021 at 12:13 PM
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I have been to a wedding with drink tickets before, and it seemed to work out well! They had someone at the door checking people in to the reception hall and then they would hand you two drink tickets when you walked in. I've heard that if you set them on the table or send them with invites, they can sometimes get lost, so just be careful if you decide to go that route!
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Savvy June 2021
Taylor · on March 9, 2021 at 12:14 PM
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I wish we could do this at ours! Our vendor has a liquor license and won't let us bring our own alcohol in. Otherwise we would probably go this route, too!
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Savvy June 2021
Taylor · on March 9, 2021 at 12:15 PM
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Thank you for the advice! That's a good idea 👍🏼
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Savvy June 2021
Taylor · on March 9, 2021 at 12:16 PM
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Actually, yes. My fiance and I have talked about a lot of our more distant family and friends probably drinking more if it's paid for. I've seen that happen at a lot of weddings, unfortunately.
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Rockstar December 2022
Michelle · on March 9, 2021 at 12:24 PM
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Consumption bar will not save money ever. The bill will be through the roof because they charge everytime a bottle is opened, in addition to per glass.
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Dedicated May 2019
Kylie · on March 9, 2021 at 12:38 PM
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What the OP described is a consumption bar--charging for drinks ordered. And that's simply incorrect--there are many, many times billing on consumption is cheaper than a set, per person, per hour open bar rate. You're speaking in generalities; I have never heard of a venue that charges a bottle-opening fee in addition to a per-glass fee.
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Dedicated May 2019
Kylie · on March 9, 2021 at 12:40 PM
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Ugh! That's unfortunate. I'd still offer the open bar; your venue's consumption rates are totally reasonable, like you said. I think it'll be okay! You can calculate approximately how much you think it'd cost (there are helpful calculators online) based on number of people and the length of your event, and set your budget accordingly.
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