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Natalia

Bachelorette Party Lies/ Friend Betrayal

Natalia, on August 8, 2023 at 2:00 PM Posted in Parties and Events 0 11
It’s January of 2023 and your friend gives you the great news that she’s finally getting married and that you’re also invited to her bachelorette which will be in Puerto Rico. You are excited for the news of her wedding and you’re also pumped for the bachelorette party. You offer to help with planning the party because you go to PR often and you want to be feel useful as well. You’re also in flight school busy studying theory, actual flying, check ride questions, FAA guidelines, etc. so the planning is not your priority right now but you try to make time for it. You end up setting some time aside to plan the trip but see that most of it is done, so you just add a few ideas here and there and tell your friend. Your friend tells you that due to all of her other friends having partners/kids, they’re going to keep the party local to vineyards and whatnot and she’s a little bummed, but you reassure that location doesn’t matter, what matters is that her friends are there to celebrate her. It’s now May and your friend tells to reserve a certain weekend off in July. You’re unsuccessful in doing so, but you make magic happen in trading days and finally get that weekend off. It’s now 2 weeks before the bachelorette party and you haven’t heard anything about details, budget, etc and you’ve been excited for this. You’ve been saving, working more and changing your schedule to accommodate for this, so you inquire. Your friend tells you the party isn’t happening anymore due to a giant lawsuit she and her fiancé were hit with and due to the stress, she forgot to update you. You’re understanding and sympathize with how much that sucks but you get in touch with your sister who is a lawyer to see what the best course of action is for your friend and you relay the steps for her to follow. A week goes by and you randomly decide to download and reopen your tik tok which doesn’t have your name or picture on it and the first video you see from your friends list is a bachelorette party in Puerto Rico of your friend. The people on vacation are not all members of the bridal party and this happened the week you asked your friends for details. What do you do?

11 Comments

Latest activity by Theresa, on August 9, 2023 at 10:16 PM
  • Natalia
    Natalia ·
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    I keep going back and forth on whether to skip the wedding altogether since that’s not a friend and I have no reason to support her, or I go with my bf, have a great time just us two and never speak to her again.
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  • Michelle
    Rockstar December 2022
    Michelle ·
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    That person is not a friend. Don’t attend the wedding and don’t continue having any contact.
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  • Shannon
    Super July 2022
    Shannon ·
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    That’s so wrong.
    I would decline the wedding, and that’s a wrap for that friendship.
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  • Jacks
    Rockstar November 2054
    Jacks ·
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    Oh wow. That's an awful way to be treated! Personally whether you go or not is up to you, but in my life I don't keep people around that treat me badly. Life is just too short.

    I think somehow that going to the wedding is validating her poor behaviour. She shouldn't get reinforced for that.

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  • Cece
    Rockstar October 2023
    Cece ·
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    Oh no, that’s so terrible! Do you feel you need closure, or are you able to just move on from the friendship? If you need closure, I’d confront her. If not, I’d just quietly delete her from my phone, social media, and life.
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  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa ·
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    Since it sounds like you have no intention of continuing the friendship (for a good reason!), I wouldn't bother going to the wedding. Why spend the money and show up to support someone who is willing to treat you that way? Decline the invitation and let the friendship fade. A silver lining is that you found out about this before her wedding.

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  • Michael
    Rockstar October 2023
    Michael Online ·
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    This is the sort of deception that it could be worth sharing with the fiancé. It could be a red flag. Some brides have shared stories about their fiancés that trigger warns not to do the wedding. One even came back and said the marriage was immediately bad. In this case it would be the fiancé facing a potentially bad union.

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  • C
    CM ·
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    I'd want a real conversation. Is there any chance there was a misunderstanding? Could she have taken offense to something you did or said? Did she unfairly think you dropped the ball on the bachelorette? Did someone tell her something untrue? Why the lies? Talk to her, but if there are no extenuating circumstances and it was nothing you did unknowingly to upset her, or she's being unreasonable, I'd send your regrets to both the wedding and your friendship.

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  • Teresa
    Devoted May 2024
    Teresa Online ·
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    So sorry this happened to you. I have thoughts of what I would do in this situation but 2 wrongs don't make a right. I would just do like the others have said and try and have a conversation with her and find out what happened or don't bother at all and just end the friendship with no explanation. Again I am sorry.

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  • K
    Super September 2023
    Kimberly ·
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    I’m petty, so I would want an explanation before ending the friendship. I would want the space to explain just what I did to make this trip work. But there is absolutely a more reserved route of just quietly letting the friendship go and moving on.
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  • T
    Expert May 2010
    Theresa ·
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    I'd definitely end the friendship, but first I'd contact her and say, 'Oh, hey, I just saw that really great video you guys posted on Tik Tok of your Puerto Rico trip! Wasn't I supposed to have been invited to that?' See what excuse she comes up with, if any, then politely decline her wedding invitation. Then move on.

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